Arabian Nights Entertainments (1706)/Volume 5/Story of the Barber

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4641370Arabian Nights Entertainments, Volume V — The story of the Barber

The Story of the Barber.


IN the Reign of the Califf Monstancer Billah[1], continues he, a Prince so famous for his vast Liberality towards the Poor, ten Highway-men infested the Roads about Bagdad, and for a long Time committed unheard of Robberies and Cruelties. The Califf having Notice of this, sent for the Judge of the Policy, some Days before the Feast of Bairam, and ordered him on pain of Death to bring all the Ten to him.

Scheherazade stopt here because Day appeared, and next Night resum’d her Discourse as follows.


The Hundred and Sixty Seventh Night.


THE Judge of the Policy, continu’d the Barber, used so much Diligence, and sent so many People in pursuit of the ten Robbers, that they were taken on the Day of Bairam. I was walking then on the Banks of the Tygris, and saw ten Men richly apparelled go into a Boat: I might have known they were Robbers, had I observ’d the Guards that were with them; but I look’d only to them, and thinking they were People that had a Mind to spend the Festival Day in Jollity, I enter’d the Boat with them, without saying one Word, in hopes they would allow me to be one of the Company. We went down the Tygris, and landed before the Califf’s Palace: Thad Time then to consider with my self, and to find my Mistake; when we came out of the Boat, we were surounded by a new Troop of the Judges of the Policy’s Guard, who ty’d us all, and carry’d us all before the Califf, I suffer’d my self to be ty’d as well as the rest, without speaking one Word: For to what Purpose should I have spoke, or make any Resistance? That had been the way to have been ill treated by the Guards, who would not have listen’d to me, for they are brutish Fellows that will hear no Reason; I was with the Robbers, and that was enough to make them believe me to be one.

When we came before the Califf, he order’d the ten Highway-mens Heads to be cut off immediately, The Executioner drew us up in a File within reach of his Arm, and by good Fortune I was the last. He cut off the Heads of the ten Highway-men, beginning at the first; and when he came to me he stopt. The Calif perceiving that the Executioner did not meddle with me, he grew angry: Did not I command thee, says he, to cut off the Heads of ten Highway-men, and why hast thou cut off but nine? Commander of the Faithful, says he, Heaven preserve me from disobeying your Majesty’s Orders: there are ten Corps upon the Ground, and as many Heads which I cutoff, your Majesty may count them. When the Califf saw himself that what the Executioner said was true, he look’d upon me with Amazement, and perceiving that I had not the Face of a Highway-man, says to me, Good old Man, how came you to be among those Wretches, who have deserv’d a thousand Deaths. I answered, Commander of the Faithful, I shall make a true Confession, This Morning I saw those ten Persons, whose Chastisement is a Proof of your Majesty’s Justice, take Boat: I embark’d with them, thinking they were Men going to a Treat to celebrate this Day, which is the most remarkable in our Religion.

The Califf could not Seven Hobo my Adventure and instead of treating me as a prattling Fellow, as the lame young Man did, he admired my Discretion and constant Silence. Commander of the Faithful, said I, your Majesty need not wonder at my keeping Silence, on such an Occasion, as would have made another apt to speak: I make a particular Profession of holding my Peace, and upon that Account, I have acquired the glorious Title of Silent. Thus I am called, to distinguish me from my six Brothers, This is the Effect of my Philosophy; and in a Word, in this Virtue consists my Glory and Happiness. I am very glad, says the Califf, smiling, that they gave you a Title which you so well deserve, and know how to make such good Use of. But tell me what sort of Men were your Brothers, were they like you? By no means, said I, they were all of them more given to prating than another: And as to their Persons, there was still a greater Difference betwixt them and me. The first was Hump-back’d; the second had rotten Teeth; the third had but one Eye; the fourth was blind; the fifth had his Ears cut; and the fixth had Hair-Lips. They had such Adventures as would inform you of their Characters, had I the Honour to tell them to your Majesty: And since the Califf seem’d to desire no better than that I shou’d tell him their Stories, I went on without his Order.

  1. He was raised to this Dignity in the Year of the Aegire 62.3, and Anno Dom. 1226, and was the 36h Califf of the Race of the Abbafides.