Arabian Nights Entertainments (1706)/Volume 5/The Sixth Brother
The Story of the Barber’s Sixth Brother.
I Am now only to tell the Story of my Sixth Brother, called Schacabae, with the Hair Lips. At first he was induſtrious enough to improve the 100 Drachms of Silver which fell to his Share, and became very well to paſs; but a Reverſe of Fortune brought him to beg his Bread, which he did with a great deal of Dexterity. He ſtudied chiefly to get into great Mens Houſes, by Means of their Servants and Officers, that he might have Acceſs to their Maſters, and obtain their Charity. One day as he paſſed by a magnificent Houſe, whoſe high Gate ſhew’d a very spacious Court, where there was a Multitude of his Servants; he went to one of them, and ask’d him, to whom that Houſe belonged? Good Man, replies the Servant, whence do you come, that you ask me ſuch a Queſtion? Does not all that you ſee make you underſtand that it’s the Place of a Barmecide[1]? My Brother, who very well knew the Liberality and Generoſity of the Barmecides, addreſſed himſelf to one of his Porters, for he had more than one, and pray’d them to give him an Alms. Go in, ſay they, no Body hinders you and addreſſ your ſelf to the Maſter of the Houſe, he will ſend you back ſatisfy’d.
My Brother, who expected no ſuch Civility, thanked the Porters, and with their Permiſſion enter’d the Palace, which was ſo large, that it took him a conſiderable Time to reach the Barmecide’s Apartment; at laſt he came to a fine ſquare Building of excellent Architecture, and enter’d by a Porch, through which he ſaw one of the fineſt Gardens, with Gravel Walks of ſeveral Colours, extreamly pleaſant to the Eye: The lower Apartments round this Square were the moſt of them open, and were ſbut only with great Curtains to keep out the Sun, which were open’d again when the Heat was over.
Such an agreeable Place ſtruck my Brother with Admiration, and might well have done ſo to a Man far above his Quality. He went on ’till he came into a Hall richly furniſhed, and adorned with Painting of Gold and Azure Foliage, where he ſaw a venerable Man with a long white Beard, ſitting at the upper End of an Alcove; whence he concluded him to be the Maſter of the Houſe: and in effect it was the Barmecide himſelf, who ſaid to my Brother in a very civil Manner, That he was welcome; and ask’d him what he wanted? My Lord, anſwers my Brother, in a begging Tone, I am a poor Man; who ſtand in need of the Help of ſuch rich and generous Perſons as your ſelf. He could not have addreſs’d him ſelf to a fitter Perſon than this Lord, who had a thouſand pood Qualities.
The Barmecide ſeem’d to be aſtoniſh’d at my Brother’s Anſwer, and putting both his Hands to his Stomach, as if he would rent his Cloaths for Grief, Is it poſſible, cries he, that I am at Bagdad, and that ſuch a Man as you is ſo poor as you ſay; this is what muſt never be, My Brother fancying that he was going to give him ſome ſingular Mark of his Bounty, bleſſed him a thouſand Times, and wiſhed him all ſort of Happineſs. It ſhall not be ſaid, reply’d the Barmecide, that I will abandon you, nor will I have you to leave me. Sir, reply’d my Brother, I ſwear to you I have not eaten one Bit to Day. Is that true, replies the Barmecide, that you are faſting till now? Alas for thee, poor Man! He is ready to die for Hunger: Ho, Boy, cries he, with a loud Voice, Bring a Baſon and Water preſently, that we may waſh our Hands. Tho’ no Boy appear’d that my Brother ſaw, neither with Water nor Baſon, the Barmecide fell a rubbing his Hands, as it one had poured Water upon them, and bid my Brother come and waſh with him. Schacabas judg’d by that, that the Barmecide Lord loved to be merry, and he himſelt underſtanding Raillery, and knowing that the Poor muſt be complaiſant to the Rich, if they would have any thing from them, he came forward, and did as he did.
Come on, ſays the Barmecide, bring us ſomething to eat, and don’t let us ſtay for it, When he had ſaid ſo, tho’ nothing was brought, he began to cut as if ſomething had been brought him upon a Plate, and putting his Hand to his Mouth began to chew, and ſays to my Brother, Come Friend, eat as freely as if you were at Home come eat; you ſaid you were like to die of Hunger, but you eat as if you had no Stomach. Pardon me, my Lord, ſays Schacabac, who perfectly imitated what he did; You ſee I loſe no Time, and that I do my Part well enough. How like you this Bread ſays the Barmecide, Don’t you find it very good? O! My Lord, ſays my Brother, who ſaw neither Bread nor Meat, I never eat any thing ſo white and ſo fine, Come, eat your Belly full, ſays the Barmecide, I aſſure you_the Baker Woman that bakes me this Bread, coſt me five hundred Pieces of Gold to purchaſe her.
Here Scheherazade ſtopt becauſe it was Day, and next Night went on thus.
The Hundred and Eighty Firſt Night.
THE Barmecide, ſays the Barber after having boaſted ſo much of this Bread, which my Brother eat only in Idea, cries, Boy, bring us another Diſh; and tho’ no Boy appeared, come my good Friend, ſays he to my Brother, taſte this new Diſh; and tell me, if ever you eat better Mutton and Barley Broth than this. It’s admirable Good, replies my Brother, and therefore you ſee I eat heartily, You oblige me mightily, replies the Barmecide; I conjure you then, by the Satisfaction I have to ſee you eat ſo heartily that you eat all up ſince you like it ſo well. A little while after he calls for a Gooſe and ſweet Sauce, Vinegar, Honey, dry Raiſins, gray Peaſe, and dry Figs, which was brought juſt in the ſame manner as the other was: The Gooſe is very fat, ſays the Barmecide, eat only a Leg and a Wing, we muſt ſave our Stomach, for we have abundance of other Diſhes to come. He actually called for ſeveral other Diſhes, of which my Brother, who was ready to die of Hunger, pretended to eat; but what he boaſted of more than all the reſt, was a Lamb fed with Piſtacho-Nuts, which be ordered to be brought up in the ſame manner that the reſt were. And here’s a Diſh, ſays the Barmecide, that you will ſee at no body’s Table but my own, I wou’d have you eat your Belly full of it. Having ſpoke thus, he ſtretch’d out his Hand as if he had a Piece of Lamb in it, and putting it to my Brother’s Mouth, there, ſays he, ſwallow that, and you will know whether I had not Reaſon to boaſt of chis Diſh. My Brother thruſt out his Head, open’d his Mouth, and made as if he took the Piece of Lamb, and eat it with extream Pleaſure, I knew you would like it, ſays the Barmecide. There’s nothing in the World more fine, replies my Brother; your Table is a moſt delicious Thing. Come, bring the Ragoo preſently, I fancy you will like that as well as you did the Lamb; Well, how do you reliſh it, ſays the Barmecide? O! it’s wonderful, replies Schacabac; for here we taſte all at once, Amber, Cloves, Nutmeg, Ginger, Pepper, and the moſt odoriferous Herbs; and all theſe Taſtes are ſo well mix’d, that one does not hinder, but we may perceive the other. O how pleaſant is it! Honour this Ragoo, ſays the Barmecide, by eating heartily of it. Ho, Boy, cries he, bring us a new Ragoo. No, my Lord, and pleaſe you, replies my Brother, for indeed, I can eat no more.
Come, take away then, ſays the Barmecide, and bring the Fruit, He ſtay’d a Moment as it were to give Time for the Servants to carry away; after which, he ſays to my Brother, taſte theſe Almonds, they are freſh, new gather’d; both of them made as if they had peel’d the Almonds, and eat them; after this, the Barmecide invited my Brother to eat ſomething elſe. Look ye, ſays he, there’s all ſorts of Fruits, Cakes, dry Sweet-meats, and Conſerves, take what you like; then ſtretching out his Hand, as if he had reach’d my Brother ſomething, look ye, ſays he, there’s a Lozenge very good for Digeſtion. Schacabac made as if he eat it, and ſays, my Lord, there’s no want of Musk here, Theſe Lozenges, ſays the Barmecide, are made at my own Houſe, where there is nothing wanting to make every Thing good. He ſtill bid my Brother eat, and ſays to him, methinks you don’t eat, as if you had been ſo hungry as you ſaid, when you came in. My Lord, replies Schacabac, whoſe Jaws aked with moving, and having nothing to eat, I afſure you I am ſo full that I cannot eat one Bit more.
Well then, Friend, replies the Barmecide, We muſt drink now after we have eat ſo well. You drink Wine my Lord, replies my Brother, but I will drink none if you pleaſe; becauſe I am forbid it, You are too ſcrupulous, replies the Barmecide, do as I do. I’ll drink then out of Complaiſance, ſays Schacabac; for I ſee you will have nothing wanting to make your Treat noble; but ſince I am not accuſtom’d to drink Wine, I am afraid that I ſhall commit ſome Error in Point of Breeding, and contrary to the Reſpect that is due to you, and therefore, I pray you, once more, to excuſe me from drinking any Wine, I will be content with Water. No, no, ſays the Barmecide, you ſhall drink Wine, and at the ſame time he commanded ſome to be brought, in the ſame manner as the Meat and Fruit had been brought before. He made as if he poured out Wine, and drank firſt himſelf, and then pouring out for my Brother, preſented him the Glaſs; Drink my Health, ſays he, and let’s know if you think this Wine . My Brother made as it he took the Glaſs, and to look if the Colour was good and put it to his Noſe to try if it had a good Flavour: Then he made a low Bow to the Barmecide, to ſignify that he took the Liberty to drink his Health, and making all the Signs of a Man that drinks with Pleaſure My Lord, ſays he, this is very excellent Wine, but I think it is not ſtrong enough. If you would have ſtronger, ſaid the Barmecide, you need only ſpeak; for I have ſeveral Sorts in my Cellar. Try how you like this. Upon which, he made as if he pour’d out another Glaſs to himſelf, and then to my Brother; and did this ſo often, that Schacabac feign’d to be drunk with the Wine, took up his Hand and gave the Barmecide ſuch a Box on the Ear, as made him fall down; he lift up his Hand to give him another Blow, but the Barmecide holding up his Hand to ward it off, cries to him, What, are you mad? Then my Brother making as if he had come to himſelf again, ſays, My Lord, you have been ſo good as to admit your Slave into your Houſe, and give him a great Treat, you ſhould have been ſatisfy’d with making me eat, and not have obliged me to drink Wine; for I told you before-hand, that it might occaſion me to come ſhort in my Reſpects: I am very much troubled at it, and beg you a thouſand Pardons.
Scarce had he finiſh’d theſe Words, when the Barmecide, inſtead of being in a Rage, fella laughing with all his Might. It is a long Time, ſays he, that I wanted a Man of your Character.
Here Scheherazade broke off, and continu’d her Story next Night as follows.
The Hundred and Eighty Second Night.
THE Barmecide careſſed Schacabac mightily, and told him, I not only forgive the Blow you have given me, but I am willing henceforward we ſhould be Friends, and that you take my Houſe for your Home: You have been ſo complaiſant as to accommodate your ſelf to my Humour, and have had the Patience to bare the Jeſt out to the laſt, we will now eat in good earneſt. When he had finiſhed theſe Words, he clapp’d his Hands, and commanded his Servants, who when appear’d, to cover the Table; which was ſpeedily done, and my Brother was treated with all theſe in Reality, which he eat of betore in Fancy. At laſt they took away, and brought Wine, and at the ſame Time, a Number of handſome Slaves richly apparell’d came in and ſung ſome agreeable Airs to their muſical Inſtruments. In a Word, Schacabac had all the reaſon in the World to be ſatisfied with the Barmecide’s Civility, and Bounty; for he treated him as his familiar Friend, and ordered him a Suit out of his Wardrobe.
The Barmecide found my Brother to be a Man of ſo much Wit and Underſtanding, that in a few Days after, he truſted him with his Houſhold, and all his Affairs. My Brother acquitted himſelf very well in that Employment for twenty Years, at the End of, which, the generous Barmecide died, and leaving no Heirs, ail his Eſtate was confiſcated to the Uſe of the Prince: Upon which my Brother was reduced to his firft Condition, and joyn’d with a Caravan of Pilgrims going to Mecca, deſigning to accompliſh that Pilgrimage upon their Charity; but by Misfortune the Caravan was attacked and plundered by a Number of Bedoins[2], ſuperior to that of the Pilgrims. My Brother was then taken as a Slave by one of the Bedoins who put him under the Baſtinado for ſeveral Days, to oblige him to ranſom himſelf. Schacabac proteſted to him that it was all in vain. I am your slave, ſays he, you may diſpoſe of me as you pleaſe; but I de-clare unto you, that I am extreamly Poor, and not able to redeem my ſelf. In a Word, my Brother diſcover’d to him all his Misfortunes, and endeavour’d to ſoften him with Tears; but the Bedoin had no Mercy, and being vexed to find himſelf diſappointed of a conſiderable Sum, which he reckon’d he was ſure of, he took his Knife and ſlit my Brother’s Lips, to avenge himſelf by this Inhumanity for the Loſs that he thought he had ſuſtain’d.
The Bedoin had a handſome Wife, and frequently when he went on his Courſes, he left my Brother alone with her, and then ſhe uſed all her Endeavours to comfort my Brother under the Rigour of his Slavery; ſhe gave him Tokens enough that ſhe loved him, but he durſt not yield to her Paſſion, for fear he ſhould repent it; and therefore he ſhunn’d to be alone with her, as much as ſhe ſought the Opportunity to be alone with him. She had ſo great a cuſtom of toying and jeſting with miſerable Schacabac, when ever ſhe ſaw him, that one Day ſhe happen’d to do it in Preſence of her Husband; My Brother, without taking Notice that he obſerv’d them, (ſo his Sins would have it) jeſted likewiſe with her. The Bedoin immediately ſuppoſing that they lived together in a criminal manner, fell upon my Brother in a Rage, and after he had mangled him in a barbarous Manner, he carried him on a Camel to the Top of a Deſart Mountain, where he left him. The Mountain was on the Way to Bagdad, ſo that Paſſengers who paſſed that Way gave me an Account of the Place where he was. I went thither ſpeedily, where I found unfortunate Schacabac in a deplorable Condition; I gave him what Help he ſtood in need of, and brought him back to the City.
This is what I told the Califf Monſtanſer Billah, adds the Barber, That Prince applauded me with new Fits of Laughter. Now, ſays he, I cannot doubt but they juſtly gave you the Sir-Name of Silent. No Body can ſay the contrary; for certain Reaſons, however, I command you to depart this Town immediately, and let me hear no more of your Diſcourſe. I yielded to Neceſſity, and went to travel ſeveral Years in far Countries. I underſtood at laſt that the Califf was Dead; I returned to Bagdad, where I found not one of my Brethren alive. It was in my Return to this Town, that I did the important Service to the fine young Man, which you have heard. You are, however, Witneſs of his Ingratitude, and of the injurious Manner in which he treated me inſtead of teſtifying his Acknowledgment, he rather choſe to fly from me, and to leave his own Country. When I underſtood that he was not at Bagdad, though nobody could tell me truly whither he was gone, yet I did not forbear to go and ſeek him. I travell’d from Province to Province a long time, and when I had given over all Hopes, I met him next Day, but I did not think to find him ſo incenſed againſt me.
Scheherazade perceiving Day, broke off here, and continued her Diſcourſe next Night, thus.
The Hundred and Eighty Third Night.
SIR, the Taylor made an end of telling the Sultan of Caſgar the Hiſtory of the lame young Man, and the Barber of Bagdad, after that manner, I had the Honour to tell your Majeſty. When the Barber, continued ſhe, had finſhed his Story, we found that the young Man was not to blame for calling him a great Prattler. However, we were pleaſed that he would ſtay with us, and partake of the Treat which the Maſter of the Houſe had prepared for us. We ſat down to the Table, and were merry together til Afternoon Prayers; then all the Company parted, and I went to my Shop, ’till it was Time for me to return Home.
It was during this Interval that Hump-back came half drunk before my Shop, where he ſung and taper’d. I thought that by carrying him Home with me, I ſhould divert my Wife, therefore I brought him along: My Wife gave us a Diſh of Fiſh, and I preſented Hump-back with ſome; which he eat without taking notice of a Bone. He fell down Dead before us, and having in vain eſſay’d to help him, in the Trouble occaſion’d us by ſuch an unlucky Accident, and in the Fear it occaſion’d to us, we carry’d the Corps out, and dextrouſly lodg’d him with the Jewiſh Doctor; the Jewiſh Doctor put him into the Chamber of the Purveyor, and the Purveyor carry’d him forth into the Street, where it was believ’d the Merchant had kill’d him. This, Sir, adds the Taylor is what I had to ſay, to ſatisfy your Majeſty, who muſt pronounce whether we he worthy of Mercy or Wrath, Life or Death.
The Sultan of Caſgar look’d with a contented Air, and gave the Taylor and his Comrades their Lives. I cannot but acknowledge, ſays he, that I am more amazed with the Hiſtory of the young Cripple, with that of the Barber, and with the Adventures of his Brothers, than with the Story of my Jeſter: But before I ſend you all four away, and before we bury Hump, I would ſee the Barber who is the Cauſe that I have pardoned you: Since he is in my Capitol, it’s eaſy to ſatisfy my Curioſity: Ar the ſame time he ſent a Sergeant with the Taylor to go find him.
The Sergeant and the Taylor went immediately, and brought the Barber, whom they preſented to the Sultan; The Barber was an old Man of Ninety Years, his Eyebrows and Beard were white as Snow, his Ears hanging down, and he had a very long Noſe. The Sultan could not forbear laughing when he ſaw him. Silent Man, ſays he to him, I underſtand that you know wonderful Stories, Will you tell me ſome of then? Sir, anſwer’d the Barber, Let’s forbear the Stories if you pleaſe at preſent. I moſt humbly beg your Majeſty to permit me to ask what that Chriſtian, that Jew, that Muſſelman, and that dead Hump-back, who lies the Ground, do here before your Majeſty? The Sultan ſmiled at the Barber’s Liberty, and replied, Why do you ask? Sir, replied the Barber, It concerns me to ask, that your Majeſty may know I am not ſo great a Talker as ſome pretend, but a Man juſtly called Silent.
Scheherazade perceiving Day, held her Peace, and reſumed her Diſcourſe next Night, thus,
The Hundred and Eighty Fourth Night.
SIR, the Sultan of Caſgar was ſo complaiſant as to ſatisfy the Barber’s Curioſity. He commanded them to tell him of the Hump-back, which he earneſtly wiſhed for. When the Barber heard it, he ſhak’d his Head, as if he would ſay, there was ſomething under this which he did not underſtand: Truly, cries he, this is a ſurpriſing Story; but I am willing to examine Hump-back a little cloſely. He draws near him, ſat down on the Ground, took his Head between his Knees, and after he had look’d upon him ſtedfaſtly, he fell into ſo great a Fit of Laughter, and had ſo little Command of himſeit, that he fell backwards on the Ground, without conſidering that he was before the Sultan of Caſgar. As ſoon as he came to himſelf, It is ſaid, cries he, and not without Reaſon, that no Man dies without a Cauſe. If ever any Hiſtory deſerved to be writ In Letters of Gold, ’tis this of Hump-back.
At this, all the People look’d on the Barber as a Buffoon, or a doating old Man. Silent Man, ſays the Sultan, ſpeak to me; Why do you laugh ſo hard? Sir, anſwer’d the Barber, Swear by your Majeſty’s good Humour, that Hump-back is not dead: He is yet alive, and I ſhall be willing to paſs for a Madman, if I do not let you fee it this Minute. Having ſaid theſe Words, he took a Box wherein he had ſeveral Medicines, that he carry’d about him to make uſe of on Occaſion; and he took out a little Viol with Balſom, with which he rubb’d Hump-back’s Neck a long time, then he took out of his Caſe a neat Iron Inſtrument, which he put betwixt his Teeth, and after he had opened his Mouth, he thruſt down his Throat a Pair of ſmall Pinchers, with which he took our a bit of Fiſh and Bone which he ſhewed to all the People. Immediately Hump-back ſneez’d, ſtretch’d forth his Arms and Feet, and gave ſeveral other Signs of Life.
The Sultan of Caſgar, and thoſe with him, who were Witneſſes of this Operation, were leſs ſurpriſed to fee Hump-back revive, after he had paſſed a whole Night, and great Part of a Day, without giving any Sign of Life, than at the Merjt ond Capacity of the Barber who perform’d this; and notwithſtanding all his Faults, began to look upon him as a great Perſon. The Sultan raviſh’d with Joy and Admiration, order’d the Story of Hump-back to be writ down, with that of the Barber, that the Memory of it might, as it deſerv’d, be preſerved tor ever. Nor did he ſtop here, but that the Taylor, Jewiſh Doctor, Purveyor, and Chriſtian Merchant, might remember the Adventure which the Accident of Hump-back had occaſion’d to them, with Pleaſure; he did not ſend them away ti!l he had given them each a very rich Robe, with which he cauſed them to be cloathed in his Preſence. As for the Barber, he honoured him with a great Penſion, and kept him near his Perſon.
Thus the Sultaneſs finiſhed this long Train of Adventures, to which the pretended Death of Hump-back gave Occaſion: Then held her Peace, becauſe Day appear, Upon which her Siſter, Dinarzade, ſays to her, My Princeſs, my Sultaneſs, I am ſo much the more charm’d with the Story, you juſt now told, becauſe it concludes with an Incident I did not expect: I verily thought Hump-back was dead. This Surprize pleaſes me, ſays Schahriar, as much as the adventures of the Barber’s Brothers. The Story of the lame young Man of Bagdad, diverted me alſo very much, replies Dinarzade. I am very glad of it, dear Sitter, ſays the Sultaneſs, and ſince I have the good Fortune not to tire out the Patience of the Sultan, our Lord and Maſter, if his Majeſty will ſtill be ſo gracious as to preſerve my Life, I ſhall have the Honour to give him an Account to Morrow of the Hiſtory of the Amours of Aboulhaſſen Ali Ebn Becar, and Schemſelnihar, Favourites of the Califf Haroun Alraſchid, which is no leſs worthy of your Notice, than the Hiſtory of Hump-back. The Sultan of the Indies, who was very well ſatisfied with the Stories that Scheherazade had told him hitherto, was willing to hear that Hiſtory which ſhe promiſed. He roſe however to go to Prayers, and hold his Council, without giving any Signification of his Pleaſure towards the Sultaneſs.