Dick & Nell, or, Linky Lanky/The royal barber

The ROYAL BARBER.

LAST night as I lay on my bed,
Such am'rous thoughts came in my head,
About the ſcantiff that is ſpread,
Thro' every ſtreet and corner,

Now Dandy is the toaſt in town,
But now by Jove his match is found,
For there's one that will cut him down,
I mean the Real Barber.

He is a luſty roving blade,
And therefore maſter of his trade,
He's found a knack to pleaſe the maid,
Surpaſſes every Barber.

Sometimes to Vauxhall he does go,
Among the Ladies makes a ſhow,
His am'rous air, his bows to Chloe,
Says Madam, here's the Barber.

The Ladies much admires of him,
He is ſo airy, bright and gem,
Beſides their hair does neatly trim,
In the new faſhion'd order.

His working tools they are ſo neat,
He does his bus neſs ſo compleat,
That Lady Betty and Miſtreſs Kate,
Calls him the Real Barber.

A pretty Miſs juſt in her teens,
Chanc'd to ſpy him on the green.
And his performance ſhe had ſeen,
With a Lady in the arbour,

To try his ſkill ſhe's fully bent,
And for him into a room ſhe ſent,
Telling him her whole intent,
He was the Real Barber.

His inſtruments he did prepare,
And ſtraightway dreſs'd & trim'd her hair,
Which made the Lady for to ſwear,
He was the Skilful Barber.

All other Ladies they would tell,
Above the reſt he bore the bell,
His excellency did excel,
More than other Barbers.

An innocent Lady in the town,
With perfect age was ſtooping down,
And hearing of his great renown,
Said, ſhe muſt have the Barber.

Her hair to dreſs, and tooth to draw,
Which lay into her under jaw,
Swore that one bit ſhe cou'dn't chaw,
Unleſs ſhe got the Barber.

The greaſy Doll, the brazen cook,
Laſt Saturday's night in glaſs did look,
Upon the ladle her oath ſhe took,
That ſhe muſt have the Barber.

Now for to dreſs and trim her hair,
With powder and pometum rare,
A quarter's wages ſhe would ſpare,
To ſee the Real Barber.

The Scullion and the Kitchen-maid,
They're going crazy as they ſaid,
For the want of this jovial blade,
They call the Real Barber.

The Chimney-ſweeper's daughter Prue,
With Peggy, Polley, Nell, and Sue,
The cobler's daughter, Nancy too,
Said, ſhe muſt have the Barber.

Let Dandy then no more appear,
But to the Barber all repair,
For he can dreſs and trim their hair,
And ſet it in right order.

Now to the laſſes he is kind,
To humour them he does incline,
Upon his door he has a ſign,
To ſhow he is the Barber.