Gems of Chinese Literature/T‘an Kung-Divorce
WHEN Tzŭ-shang’s mother died, he would not attend her funeral. A disciple asked his father, Tzŭ-ssŭ (grandson of Confucius), saying, “Did not your father attend his divorced mother’s funeral?” “He did,” replied Tzŭ-ssŭ. “Then why cannot you make Tzŭ-shang do likewise?” rejoined the disciple. “My grandfather,” said Tzŭ-ssŭ, “was a man of complete virtue. With him, whatever was, was right. I cannot aspire to his level. As long as the deceased was my wife, she was my son’s mother. When she ceased to be my wife, she ceased also to be his mother.”
From that time forth, it became a rule among the descendants of Confucius not to attend the funeral of a divorced mother.