Lapsus Calami (Apr 1891)/An Election Address, Dec. 1890

by J.K.S.

An Election Address, Dec. 1890.

 

(Air: The Wearing of the Green.)

Kilkenny dear, and did ye hear this most surprising news?
Here's three bould men come coortin' you and which can you refuse?
A bigger and a bloodier fight has never yet been seen,
And they're breaking one another's heads in Committee Room fifteen.

I met Chief Justice Healy and I took him by the hand:
"Oh! how is ould Ireland, and how does she stand?"
Potatoes rot and peasants pine: disthress will soon be seen:
And they're breaking one another's heads in Committee Room fifteen."

Dear Dillon and O'Brien bould, as I have heard men tell,
Have gone to North Amerikey, their resources for to swell;
But they're coming back to prison and the try-your-weight machine,
And to break the other fellows' heads in Committee Room fifteen.

There's Disunited Ireland (but that same has been suppressed):
There's some "cowardly little scoundrels" and a nicely feathered nest;
There's lots of cash in Paris, and the wigs are on the green,
And they're breaking one another's heads in Committee Room fifteen.

There's bloody Arthur Balfour, that priest-destroying man,
'Tis he that passed Coercion, and does all the harm he can,
A blacker and a baser brute there never yet has been,
And he chuckles o'er the broken heads in Committee Room fifteen.

He gets upon an outside car,—'tis he that has the power—
Goes up and down the land and seeks for what we may devour—
And bedad we're glad to see him, and 'tis he likes being seen,
And they're breaking one another's heads in Committee Room fifteen.

And here is Mr S. . . . . ., and who the deuce is he?
And what's he after doing, and why would he be M.P.?
For he first says "God save Ireland!" and then "God save the Queen!"
And he blackguards thim bould fighting bhoys in Committee Room fifteen.