Live and Learn (The Pearl)

For works with similar titles, see Live and Learn.

When I was little and good,
A long time ago 'm afraid, Miss;
A stiff prick was not understood,
I was a quiet little, shy little maid, Miss.

I knew but one use for my cunt,
I knew not what joy 'twould afford me.
The sight of a cock would affront,
And talk about fucking have bored me.

But now, oh, much wiser I've grown!
I'll stretch my legs open for any,
My modest shy feelings have flown.
And fucks, why, I can't get too many!

I like a stiff prick up my arse.
Though too much of that makes you bandy.
When I look at my quim in the glass,
It always pouts red and looks randy.

I like a fuck - morn, noon, and night,
On every weekday and Sunday:
If I'm fucked on the Sabbath, all right!
But I want to be buggered on Monday.

Oh! Let it be hot or be cold,
I'm always alive for a cock, Miss;
Men, fair, dark, young or old,
Here's a hole that'll take in their jock, Miss!

I can spend for an hour at a time.
My cunt is as hot as fire, Sir;
The man that says: "Fucking is crime,"
I say to his face, he's a liar, Sir.

Then give me a prick in each hand,
Turn my arse north, my cunt to the south;
And get an your jocks well to stand,
One in each hole and one in my mouth;

I'll fuck and I'll suck and I'll frig,
Until you're all quite bloody well spent, Sir!
Then I'll take in the lodgers again,
And never once ask them for rent, Sir!

Hurrah! for my cunt, my best friend.
Hurrah! for a cock to kiss, Sir;
I'll fuck till this life comes to end,
I hope too, there's fucking in bliss, Sir!"