Of the Imitation of Christ/Book III/Chapter XLVIII
CHAPTER XLVIII.
OF THE DAY OF ETERNITY, AND THIS LIFE'S STRAITNESSES.
MOST blessed mansion of the city which is above! O most clear day of eternity, which night obscureth not, but the highest truth ever enlighteneth! O day ever joyful, ever secure, and never changing into a contrary state!
O that that day would once appear, and that all things temporal were at an end!
To the saints it shineth, glowing with unceasing brightness, but to those that are pilgrims on the earth, it appeareth only afar off, and as through a glass.
2. The citizens of heaven do know how joyful that day is; but the banished children of Eve bewail its bitterness and tediousness.
The days of this life are short and evil, full of sorrow and straitnesses.
Here a man is defiled with many sins, ensnared with many passions, held fast by many fears, racked with many cares, distracted with many curiosities, entangled with many vanities, compassed about with many errors, worn with many labours, burdened with temptations, enervated by pleasures, tormented with want.
3. O when shall these evils be at an end? when shall I be delivered from the miserable bondage of my sins? when shall I be mindful, O Lord, of Thee alone? when shall I fully rejoice in Thee?
When shall I enjoy true liberty without impediment, without trouble of mind and body.
When shall I have solid peace, peace secure and undisturbed, peace within and peace without, peace every way assured?
O merciful Jesu, when shall I stand to behold Thee? when shall I contemplate the glory of Thy kingdom? when wilt Thou be unto me all in all?
O when shall I be with Thee in Thy kingdom, which Thou hast prepared for Thy beloved from all eternity?
I am left, a poor and banished man, in the land of mine enemies, where there are daily wars and great calamities.
4. Comfort my banishment, assuage my sorrow: for my whole desire sigheth after Thee.
For all is burdensome to me, whatsoever this world offereth for consolation.
I long to enjoy Thee inwardly, but I cannot attain unto it.
My desire is, that I may be wholly given up to heavenly things, but temporal things and unmortified passions weigh me down.
With the mind I wish to be above all things, but with the flesh I am enforced against my will to be beneath all.
Thus, unhappy man that I am, I fight against myself, and am become grievous to myself, whilst my spirit seeketh to be above, and my flesh to be below.
5. O what do I inwardly suffer, whilst in my mind I dwell on things heavenly, in my prayers a multitude of carnal fancies rise up! O my God, be not Thou far from me, nor turn away in wrath from Thy servant.
Cast forth Thy lightning and disperse them; shoot out Thine arrows, and let all the imaginations of the enemy be confounded.
Gather in and call home my senses unto Thee; make me to forget all worldly things; enable me to cast away speedily, and to despise all the wicked imaginations.
Succour me, Thou the everlasting truth, that no vanity may move me.
Come to me, Thou heavenly sweetness, and let all impurity flee from before Thy face.
Pardon me also, and in mercy deal gently with me, as often as in prayer I think on aught beside Thee.
Truly I must confess, that I am wont to yield to many distractions.
Oftentimes I am not where I stand or sit, but rather I am there, whither my thoughts do carry me.
Where my thoughts are, there am I; and commonly there are my thoughts, where my affection is.
That too readily occurs to me, which is by nature delightful, or by custom is pleasing.
6. And for this cause. Thou that art truth itself hast plainly said, Where thy treasure is, there will thy heart be also.
If I love heaven, I willingly muse on heavenly things.
If I love the world, I rejoice at the felicity of the world, and grieve for the adversity thereof.
If I love the flesh, I shall often fancy those things that are pleasing to the flesh.
If I love the Spirit, I shall delight to think on things spiritual.
For whatsoever I love, thereof do I willingiy speak and hear, and carry home with me the forms thereof.
But blessed is the man, who for Thy sake, O Lord, is willing to part with all creatures, who does violence to his nature, and through fervour of Spirit crucifieth the lusts of the flesh; that so with a serene conscience he may offer pure prayers unto Thee, and, all earthly things both outwardly and inwardly being excluded, be may be meet to be admitted into the angelic choir.