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I had not continued in this joy many days when Satan came upon me like a flood, charged me afresh with all my sins, and told me, there was no possibility of my being saved. This sunk me very low. I went to the Curate and told him all my trouble. He bid me, “Not be afraid, for all would be well.” I went away pretty well contented. But I had not been long at home before Satan began to tempt me another way. He suggested, That the Bible was but a cunningly devised Fable ; that there was no Christ, yea, no God. The temptation was the heavier, because I had no man to open my mind to. But the Lord was with me in my temptation, and gave me the consolation of his Spirit ; which tho’ not continuing long at a time, yet gently refreshed my soul.
After some time, a maid servant of our Colonel, observing a change in my life and conversation, came to my room, and after a little discourse asked me, “If I would go with her to hear the Methodists?” I told her what a blessing I had found at Church, and said, I did not care to go any where else. But some days after, another woman importuned me much. I promised, I would go once. I went with her to hear Mr. Trembath, and was wonderfully pleased, to hear him preach without book. Yet it was some time before I went to hear again. In the mean time I was overcome by one of my besetting sins, anger. For a mere trifle, I spoke hastily to my wife, and continued for some time in a violent passion. My peace was gone : the visitations of the Holy One were withdrawn, and my soul covered with darkness and horror. What to do, I could not tell : I would have done anything, to regain what I had lost. When I was advised to go and hear the Methodists again, I readily went, and hearing the preacher say, All manner of sins shall be forgiven unto man ; only let him come to Christ : my hope so sweetly revived, that I had no more occasion to be asked, to hear