be for me a grave, and may leave nothing of my body, in order that, when I have fallen asleep, I may not be a burden upon any one. Then shall I be in truth a disciple of Jesus Christ, when the world seeth not even my body. Entreat of our Lord in my behalf, that through these instruments I may be found a sacrifice to God. I do not, like Peter and Paul, issue orders unto you. They are[1] apostles, but I am one condemned; they indeed are free, but I am a slave, even until now. But if I suffer, I shall be the freed-man of Jesus Christ, and I shall rise in Him from the dead, free. And now being in bonds, I learn to desire nothing.
Chap. v.
From Syria, and even unto Rome, I am cast among wild beasts, by sea and by land, by night and by day, being bound between ten leopards, which are the band of soldiers, who, even when I do good to them, all the more do evil unto me. I, however, am the rather instructed by their injurious treatment;[2] but not on this account am I justified to myself. I rejoice in the beasts which are prepared for me, and I pray that they may in haste be found for me; and I will provoke them speedily to devour me, and not be as those which are afraid of some other men,[3] and will not approach them: even should they not be willing to approach me, I will go with violence against them. Know me from myself what is expedient for me.[4] Let no one[5] envy me of those things
- ↑ Literally, "they are who are."
- ↑ Literally, "by their injury."
- ↑ Literally, "and not as that which is afraid of some other men." So Cureton translates, but remarks that the passage is evidently corrupt. The reference plainly is to the fact that the beasts sometimes refused to attack their intended victims. See the case of Blandina, as reported by Eusebius (Hist. Eccl. v. 1).
- ↑ Cureton renders interrogatively, "What is expedient for me?" and remarks that "the meaning of the Syriac appears to be, 'I crave your indulgence to leave the knowledge of what is expedient for me to my own conscience.'"
- ↑ Literally, "nothing."
