and I assured him that if he exhibited generosity on this occasion, the entire Allbutt-Innett family, self included, would ever pray on the crooked hinges of knees for his temporal and spiritual welfare.
He heard me benignantly, but said he regretted that it was not in his power to oblige me.
"You are not to suppose," I said, "that I am a native Tom-dick or Harry. I am a B.A. of Calcutta University, and candidate for call to Bar. In additum I am the literary celebrity, being especially retained to jot and tittle for the periodical of Punch."
Mr Breakwater assured me earnestly that he fully appreciated my many distinguished claims, but that he was under an impossibility of granting my petition for an invite to the annual summer soirée, owing to the fact that aforesaid festivity was already the fait accompli.
"How is that?" I exclaimed. "Have I not read in the daily press of a grand durbar to be given shortly in honour of Hon'ble Hung Chang?"
"But that is at the Foreign Office," he objected; "we have no connection with such a concern."
"The Foreign Office would be better than nullity," I said. "I will tell you what to do. Write me a letter to show to the head of the Foreign Office. You can state that you have
