Monsieur Segotin's Story
the physique as a quick shot through the heart or the rather slower business of being crucified and roasted alive. Yes, Monsieur, it is possible to die of too many orange and pink proclamations; yes, and to go mad first. I have seen it with these eyes.
"They began, then, like good Germans, by making arrangements for their own comfort. They distributed amongst us a large quantity of forms which they had brought with them—for, mark you, these people think of everything—and which each householder was required to fill up and return to the mayor. This form was a declaration first as to the number of men, women and children in the household, and then as to the quantity of provisions and other commodities and animals in the possession of the declarant, such as groceries of every kind, bottled wine, champagne, common brands, liqueurs and cognac, cigars, tobacco, motor-cars and their engines, bicycles, candles, matches, petrol, horses (both cart and riding) in working order, horses injured by work, horses injured by projectiles, harness, oxen, cows, pigs, sheep, calves, fowls, chickens, eggs, though as far as the last were concerned they made no distinction as to their age or as to their being broken or no. Nor did they ask for ducks or turkeys or geese. Strange omissions, but no doubt they had their own reasons, for making them, since they always have their reasons. They also left out lambs and sucking-pigs, with ducklings, goslings and chicken turkeys. It is a mystery why these things were not scheduled. Perhaps it was a bit of
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