t h e p e a r s o n ' s c l o n e s
"I'm gonna strangle that ignorant cunt!" I roared, coming to my feet, fists clenched.
"Bruce calm yourself!" Joan commanded, but I wasn't listening. "You aren't being a good role model!"
"Or even less of a role model than you usually are," Emo quipped under his breath.
Alex snorted once despite herself.
I shook my head and started pacing with a growl, "I'll kick her dumpy ass up and down the street for all the neighbors to see!"
"Yes Bruce," Joan said calmly, "that will show them what a respectable and mature human being you are."
"How can you be so--?" I stopped. Of course, I knew why she was so calm. I was freaking out. That meant she had to assume the responsibility of being the sane one. Only one member of a marriage is allowed to lose control at a time. She had broken down earlier, and now it was my turn.
"You're trying to change the subject Dad," Emo was trembling with anger now. "This isn't about Mrs. Ford—"
"Yes it is!" I shouted.
"No it isn't!" Alex and Emo shouted simultaneously.
I couldn't hope to compete with their unified voice. They were louder, and that meant they had the floor. All family discussions adhere to this protocol. Otherwise there would be no order.
"It's your fault we're clones!" Emo shouted pointing at me.
"It's your fault everyone makes fun of us behind our backs!" Alex shrieked.
"You're a terrible father!" Joan caterwauled.
"Calls us demon spawn!"
"Says you're a pervert!"
"Always setting a bad example!"
Forget what I said about "order.'
"No! Look—wait! Hush! Everybody be quiet for a minute!" I threw up my hands, pacing around the kitchen table as I spoke, "Now I‘m the man of this household—"
"One of the two men in the household!" Emo interjected forcefully.
-11-
