310
HUDIBRAS.
[PART III.
And laid her dowry out in law,
To null her jointure with a flaw, 1190
Which I beforehand had agreed
T' have put, on purpose, in the deed,
And bar her widow's-making-over
T' a friend in trust, or private lover.
What made thee pick and chuse her out 1195
T' employ their sorceries about?—
That which makes gamesters play with those
Who have least wit, and most to lose.
But didst thou scourge thy vessel thus,
As thou hast damn'd thyself to us?— 1200
I see you take me for an ass:
'Tis true, I thought the trick would pass
Upon a woman well enough.
As 't has been often found by proof;
Whose humours are not to be won 1205
But when they are impos'd upon;
For love approves of all they do
That stand for candidates, and woo.
Why didst thou forge those shameful lies
Of bears and witches in disguise?— 1210
That is no more than authors give
The rabble credit to believe;
A trick of following their leaders,
To entertain their gentle readers;
And we have now no other way 1215
Of passing all we do or say;
Which, when 'tis natural and true,
Will be believ'd b' a very few,
Beside the danger of offence,
The fatal enemy of sense. 1220
Why dost thou chuse that cursed sin,
Hypocrisy, to set up in?—
Because it is the thriving'st calling,
The only saints' bell that rings all in;[1]
To null her jointure with a flaw, 1190
Which I beforehand had agreed
T' have put, on purpose, in the deed,
And bar her widow's-making-over
T' a friend in trust, or private lover.
What made thee pick and chuse her out 1195
T' employ their sorceries about?—
That which makes gamesters play with those
Who have least wit, and most to lose.
But didst thou scourge thy vessel thus,
As thou hast damn'd thyself to us?— 1200
I see you take me for an ass:
'Tis true, I thought the trick would pass
Upon a woman well enough.
As 't has been often found by proof;
Whose humours are not to be won 1205
But when they are impos'd upon;
For love approves of all they do
That stand for candidates, and woo.
Why didst thou forge those shameful lies
Of bears and witches in disguise?— 1210
That is no more than authors give
The rabble credit to believe;
A trick of following their leaders,
To entertain their gentle readers;
And we have now no other way 1215
Of passing all we do or say;
Which, when 'tis natural and true,
Will be believ'd b' a very few,
Beside the danger of offence,
The fatal enemy of sense. 1220
Why dost thou chuse that cursed sin,
Hypocrisy, to set up in?—
Because it is the thriving'st calling,
The only saints' bell that rings all in;[1]
- ↑ The small bell, which rings immediately before the minister begins the
tenance paid by the husband to the wife, where she is not convicted of adultery. The Earl of Strafford relates a case rather worse than Hudibras intended;—Queen Elizabeth reprimanded Stakeley for ill-using his wife, to which he replied, that "he had already turned her into her petticoat, and if any one could make more of her, they might take her for him."
