410
HUDIBRAS.
[PART III.
But since those times and feats are over, 385
They are not for a modern lover,
When mistresses are too cross-grain'd,
By such addresses to be gain'd;
And if they were, would have it out
With many another kind of bout. 390
Therefore I hold no course s' infeasible,
As this of force, to win the Jezebel,
To storm her heart by th' antic charms
Of ladies errant, force of arms;
But rather strive by law to win her, 395
And try the title you have in her.
Your case is clear, you have her word,
And me to witness the accord;[1]
Besides two more of her retinue
To testify what pass'd between you; 400
More probable, and like to hold,
Than hand, or seal, or breaking gold,[2]
For which so many that renounc'd
Their plighted contracts have been trounc'd,
And bills upon record been found, 405
That forc'd the ladies to compound;
And that, unless I miss the matter,
Is all the bus'ness you look after.
Besides, encounters at the bar
Are braver now than those in war, 410
In which the law does execution
With less disorder and confusion;
Has more of honour in 't, some hold,
Not like the new way, but the old,[3]
When those the pen had drawn together, 415
Decided quarrels with the feather,
And winged arrows kill'd as dead,
And more than bullets now of lead:
So all their combats now, as then,
Are manag'd chiefly by the pen; 420
They are not for a modern lover,
When mistresses are too cross-grain'd,
By such addresses to be gain'd;
And if they were, would have it out
With many another kind of bout. 390
Therefore I hold no course s' infeasible,
As this of force, to win the Jezebel,
To storm her heart by th' antic charms
Of ladies errant, force of arms;
But rather strive by law to win her, 395
And try the title you have in her.
Your case is clear, you have her word,
And me to witness the accord;[1]
Besides two more of her retinue
To testify what pass'd between you; 400
More probable, and like to hold,
Than hand, or seal, or breaking gold,[2]
For which so many that renounc'd
Their plighted contracts have been trounc'd,
And bills upon record been found, 405
That forc'd the ladies to compound;
And that, unless I miss the matter,
Is all the bus'ness you look after.
Besides, encounters at the bar
Are braver now than those in war, 410
In which the law does execution
With less disorder and confusion;
Has more of honour in 't, some hold,
Not like the new way, but the old,[3]
When those the pen had drawn together, 415
Decided quarrels with the feather,
And winged arrows kill'd as dead,
And more than bullets now of lead:
So all their combats now, as then,
Are manag'd chiefly by the pen; 420
- ↑ Ralpho, no doubt, was ready to witness anything that would serve his turn; and hoped the widow's two attendants would do the same.
- ↑ The breaking of a piece of gold between lovers was formerly much practised, and looked upon as a firm marriage contract.
- ↑ Ralpho persuades the Knight to gain the widow, at least her fortune, not by the use of fire-arms, but by the feathered quill of the lawyer.
