412
HUDIBRAS.
[PART III.
While lawyers have more sober sense, 455Than t' argue at their own expense,[1]But make their best advantagesOf others' quarrels, like the Swiss;[2]And out of foreign controversies,By aiding both sides, fill their purses; 460But have no int'rest in the CauseFor which th' engage and wage the laws,Nor further prospect than their pay,Whether they lose or win the day.And tho' th' abounded in all ages, 465With sundry learned clerks and sages;Tho' all their bus'ness be dispute,With which they canvass ev'ry suit,They 've no disputes about their art,Nor in polemics controvert; 470While all professions else are foundWith nothing but disputes t' abound:Divines of all sorts, and physicians,Philosophers, mathematicians;The Galenist, and Paracelsian, 475Condemn the way each other deals in;[3]Anatomists dissect and mangle,To cut themselves out work to wrangle;Astrologers dispute their dreams,That in their sleeps they talk of schemes; 480And heralds stickle, who got who,So many hundred years ago.But lawyers are too wise a nation T' expose their trade to disputation, Or make the busy rabble judges 485Of all their secret piques and grudges;
- ↑ The wisdom of lawyers is such, that however they may seem to quarrel at the bar, they are good friends the moment they leave the court. Unlike us, Independents and Presbyterians, who, though our opinions are very similar, are always wrangling about the merest trifles.
- ↑ The Swiss mercenaries, as they are commonly called, if well paid, will enter into the service of any foreign power: but, according to the adage, "point d'argent, point de Suisse."
- ↑ The followers of Galen advocated the use of herbs and roots; the disciples of Paracelsus recommended mineral preparations, especially mercury.
