the other." Later she said: "When the way of perfection was opened out before me, I realized that, in order to become a saint, one must suffer much … always seek the most perfect path, and forget oneself. I also understood that there are many degrees of holiness, that each soul is free to respond to the calls of our Lord, to do much or little for His love—in a word, to choose among the sacrifices He asks. And then … I cried out: 'My God, I choose everything, I will not be a saint by halves. I am not afraid of suffering for Thee. I fear only one thing, and that is, to do my own will. Accept the offering of my will, for I choose all that Thou willest.'" The reason was because her Love was crucified:
"No other joy my heart would know
Save immolation like to Thine!"
"Souls strong and pure, in life's dark night of sorrow,
Claim but one glory here—the cross to bear."
In her zeal for souls she sang:
"I love the Cross, I sigh for anguish,
Suffering for God is my desire:
If but one soul in fetters languish,
With thousand lives I would expire!"
This thirst became "more vast than the universe" and developed into a "veritable martyrdom," so that, thinking of the fearful torments of the martyrs, she exclaimed: "I do not sigh for one torment; I need them all to slake my thirst. My heart thrills at the thought of the frightful tortures Christians are to suffer at the time of Antichrist, and I long to suffer them all. Open, O Jesus, the Book of Life, in which are written the deeds of Thy saints; all the deeds recorded in that book I long to have accomplished for Thee!" Nor did she ever repent of her desire, for only a few hours before her death she said: "Yes, all that I have written about my thirst for suffering is really true. I do not regret having surrendered myself to Love." Nor will I if I do so…!
