'GOD'S PEACE' 293
sends me this turtle-dove letter is only a dove in so far as she can croon in love-sick fashion, she will never become a hawk, she lacks that fanaticism of emotion, which sharpens claws and beak. She only took me for her lover, because it flattered her vanity to be chosen by me. She feels a certain emptiness in her life now I am gone. She wishes to have me back, because it angers her that I have left her of my own free will. But within a very short time the happiness she desires will blossom again, the empty place will be taken by a new lover, who, though he may be different, will have just as many advantages. Her bitterness towards me will vanish, and when in after years we meet again, we will greet each other pleasantly like two friends who have never gone through life's seriousness together, who have scarcely had moments together worthy remembrance or forgetfulness.
That is the naked truth, and that explains why I was able to leave her without finding it necessary to say good-bye. Here was no question of a quarrel. What could I have said to her but a lukewarm ' thanks for a good time.' Here was no gordian knot to cut asunder, only a loosely-twisted cotillon- bow to untie, the red ribbon from the white. I could not persuade myself to say the stereotyped words of comfort and thanks at this mock-funeral. I was ashamed to play a part in a scene of such evident make-believe, to give the cue to her who, without doubt, would have played a great drama in the most approved style.
