TALKS WITH A KID BROTHER
The captain looked him over and smiled. "I don't believe we have any suit to fit you," he said kindly, "but you come down to-morrow. That's the right spirit."
The college along the side lines smiled audibly the next day when Simple Simon trotted out with the other men, or tried to, puffing and blowing, in a much-stretched sweater and a pair of breeches that had been opened in the rear to admit him. But he was accustomed to being a cause of amusement and did not mind. They laughed louder still when in the first scrimmage he was toppled over like a huge nine-pin. "Did you feel the earth shake?" asked a humorist.
The business-like captain yelled, "Line up, fellows!" The crowd roared; they saw Simon lying there on his back, flapping his arms and legs like an overturned turtle. He was not hurt—simply too fat. The next scrimmage the same thing happened. After that they reached over to pull him up as a matter of course. But with three or four more scrimmages Simple Simon had to re-
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