MR. PIPS HIS DIARY.
did ſome of their Maſters look not much better; being dreſſed in a Court Suit, which methinks do make a Gentleman ſeem a ſort of embroidered Quaker. I do greatly wonder why the uglieſt Apparel of any Date in Engliſh Hiſtory ſhould be pitched upon for the Court Dreſs. But the ſplendid Carriages painted with Coats of Arms, and the ſtately capariſoned Horſes, did make a rare Show; and among them mighty droll to mark the Hack Cabs that were not ſuffered to enter at the Palace Gate; ſo the Fares had to alight and walk on Foot the Reſt of the Way to the Drawing-Room: and ſo into the Preſence of Her Majesty in dirty Boots: which, now I bethink me, was not ſeemly; the rather as many of them are Half Pay Officers, and other poor but loyal Subjects, who could afford no better than a Cab. But good Lack! it did moſt tickle me to view the Sheriff's Coach, which for Magnificence did exceed the Fairy's Chariot in the Opera-Play of Cinderella; and great Sport it was to hear and ſee the little raſcal Boys ſhout and clap their Hands as it went by. Alſo it did give me extreme Amuſement to notice the gimcrack Equipages and bearded Viſages, and Playhouſe Attire of the different Foreign Ambaſſadors; of whom I think the Turkiſh was the moſt grand. It did make me laugh not a little to ſee the Police with their Truncheons, keeping order among the Vagabonds, till one did tell me to move on, which did vex me. Then there were the Guards, in full Uniform on Horſeback, with their Helmets on their Heads and their Swords drawn, about one under each Lamp Poſt, mounting Guard, very warlike to look upon, and I believe this is the heavieſt Part of their Duty. What with the blazing Uniforms and glittering Jewels, and illuminated Coaches, and the Laughter I was moved to by the motley Footmen and Foreigners, my Eyes were dazzled and my Head did ſomewhat ache; moreover, ſome pretty faces I did gaze upon did put my Heart in a Flutter, which did not think fit to mention to my Wife. Methinks how fine it would be to ride in State to Court, if it were not ſo chargeable, and I ſhould much delight in the Honour and Glory of the Thing, but ſhould not at all like the Expenſe. A Drawing-Room doth altogether eclipſe the Lord Mayor's Show; although it do ſeem but a Toy and gilt Gingerbread Affair, and an empty, childiſh Diſplay, like the Babies' Game of King and Queen; but then it hath certainly this Advantage, that it do much good to Trade.
