Page:MeditationsOnTheMysteriesOfOurHolyV1.djvu/127

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Thou wilt die that he may not die. Pardon, O Lord, my inhuman unthankfulness, and aid me with Thy abundant grace, that I may no more return to fall into so horrible a misery! Amen.

POINT III.

1. Thirdly, I must consider what motive I had to sin; for doubtless it increases the greatness of the injury when it is done upon a very light cause and occasion. For why did I offend Almighty God? For a little wantonness of the flesh, for a punctilio of honour, for a small interest of wealth, for a slight pleasing of my own will; finally, for things most vile, that pass like smoke, and are as if they were not in comparison of God. And yet, being such, for them I "denied by my works" [1] the living God, and made of them to myself an idol and false God, esteeming them more than the true God, crucifying Christ within me to give life to Barabbas, that is, sin.

Colloquy. — O my Lord, with great reason say est Thou to the " heavens" that they should be " astonished," and to " the gates" of heaven that they should " be very desolate" and burst with amazement, for "two evils" which Thy "people" committed! And yet I, wretched sinner! have committed them infinite times, leaving Thee that art " the fountain of living water" to draw with labour out of " broken cisterns that can hold no water." [2] O labour ill-employed! O inconsiderate change! I left the infinite God, and the perpetual fountain of infinite and eternal good, for a thing of nothing, of temporal and perishing good, which, like a broken cistern, loses imperceptibly the water that it held, and remains dry. O my soul, if the deed of Esau seem so vile to thee, that sold his birthright for a small dish of pottage, [3] how much more vile shall thine be that sellest thy birthright of heaven for

  1. Tit. i. 16.
  2. Jer. ii. 12.
  3. Gen. xxv. 34; Heb. xii. 16.