Cars with soft reclining chairs,
Where we nestle free from cares;
Cars no cynic can place fault on,
Chicago, Kansas City, Alton.
Spite of distance, time, or weather,
See three cities link'd together.
CEILA—That is extremely true and very pretty. Moreover, it is a very noble employment, this acting in behalf of the foremost railway of the world. Still, we are not altogether happy. Since our queen banished Iolanthe, our life has not been a transcendent one.
LEILA—Ah, Iolanthe was a whole team, and, like the Alton Road, she was the only one in the crowd who carried a proper train. But according to the laws of Fairydom, she committed an unpardonable sin. The fairy who marries a mortal must die.
CEILA—But Iolanthe is not dead. (Enter Fairy Queen.)
QUEEN—No, because your queen, who loved her as much as a member of the State legislature loves a railway pass, commuted her sentence to travel for life on other lines, and sooner than do it she confined herself in a pond.
LEILA—And she is now working out her sentence in Iowa.
QUEEN—Yes. I gave her the choice of States. I am sure I never intended that she should go and live under a culvert beneath the bank of an Iowa railway.
LEILA—It must be damp there, and her chest was always delicate.
QUEEN—Yes. An Iowa railway is hardly the place to send a delicate chest. Even an iron-bound trunk has no show on any other line than the Chicago & Alton. I do not understand why she went there.
ALL—How terrible: but, O Queen, forgive her.
QUEEN—I 've half a mind to.
LEILA—Make it half and half, and wholly do it.
QUEEN—Well, it shall be as you wish. Arise, lolanthe.
(Iolanthe arises.)
IOLANTHE—Must I again reflect my grievous fault on
