Rupert. Shall we toss up?
Leila. Well, all I was going to say———
Rupert. Yes?
Leila. All I was going to say is, that I call that a jolly good parcel. (Holds it up.)
Brandon. Excellent.
Leila. Well, now what were you going to say?
Rupert. I’ve really no idea. . . . What are your own moral standards, then, Leila?
Leila. Mine?
Brandon. Oh, Leila believes in the Ten Commandments, doesn’t she?
Rupert. Oh no. Surely not.
Raglan. Why, what’s wrong with the Ten Commandments?
Rupert. Nothing whatever. Indeed, I have no doubt that they were of the profoundest significance to the nomadic needs of the tribe to whom they were delivered. Their inadequacy and irrelevance for to-day, though, must be sufficient to condemn them. I have often attempted to discover whether it is within the range of any of us to observe even one of them. Honour my father and mother, of course I do. How could I do otherwise? Indeed, on the occasion of my birthday, I have never failed to send them a telegram of congratulation. Though whether this will make my days any longer in the land which has been given us must remain in doubt. But look at the others. Keep holy the Sabbath day. I don’t. Take not the name of the Lord in vain. I do. Thou shalt do no murder. But I have done murder, as I have explained.
Brandon. And the seventh, Rupert?
Rupert. Committed. Since infancy. (Pause.) Thou shalt not steal. But Property itself, as Proudhon has explained to us, is theft. And I am a man of property. Moreover, these are your matches. (Produces box.) Indeed the only clause I am sincerely capable of adhering
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