Page:Scots piper's queries, or, John Falkirk's cariches (3).pdf/8

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The Scots Piper's Queries.

certain day in the year; the broad goose lays her first egg on Fasterns Even, old stile; the crows begin to build their nest the first of March, old stile; the swans observe matrimony, and if the female die, the male dares not take up with another, or the rest will put him to death; all the birds in general, join in pairs, and keep so; but the dove resembles the adulterer, when the she-ones turns old, he pays her away, and takes another; the locusts observe military order, and march in bands; the frogs resemble pipers and preachers, for the young ride the old to death.

Q. Who are the merriest and heartiest people in the world?

A. The sailors, for they'll be singing and cursing one another, when the waves their graves, are going over their heads.

Q. Which are the disorderliest creatures in battle?

A. Cows and dogs, for they all fall upon them that are neathmost.

Q. Who are the vainest sort of people in the world?

A. A barber, a taylor, a young soldier, and a poor dominie.

Q. What is the great cause of the barber's vanity?

A. His being admitted to trim noblemen's chasts, thyke their sculls, tak kings by the nose, and hold a razor to his very throat, which no subject else dare do.