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 When steward I'm promoted, I'll snip a tradesman's bill,
My master's coffers empty, my pockets for to fill;
When rolling in my chariot, so great a man I'll be,
You'll forget the little plow-boy that whistl'd o'er the lee.

 I'll buy votes at elections, but when I've made the pelf,
I'll stand poll for the parliament, & then vote in myself;
Whatever's good for me, Sir, I never will oppose,
When all my ay's are sold off, why then I'll sel my no's.

 I'll bawl harangue, and paragraph, with speeches charm the ear,
And when I'm tired on my legs, then I'll set up a Peers;
In court or city honour, so great a man I'd be
You'll forget the little plow-boy that whistl'd o'er the lee.

Divider from 'The Snug Bit of Land in the Ocean', a chapbook printed in Glasgow in 1800

THE MARRIAGE ACT.

The fool that is wealthy is sure of a bride;
For riches, like fig-leaves, their nakedness hide;
The slave that is poor must starve all his life,
In a batchelor's bed, without mistress or wife.

 In good days of yore they ne'er troubled their heads,
In settling of jointures, or making of deeds;
But Adam and Eve, when they first enter'd course,
E'en took one another, for better, for worse.

 Then prithee, dear Chloe, ne'er aim to be great;
Let love be thy jointure; ne'er mind an estate:
You can never be poor, who have all those charms;
And I shall be rich, when I've you in mine arms.