23
HIPPSLEY'S DRUNKEN MAN.
Here Betty you jade! bring me a pint of half-and-half—be sure you mix them—and put them in separate jugs. Betty! hang that girl—she goes up stairs twenty times a-day, and never comes down again. Confound the back of this chair, it is always behind. Well, I have given my wife the slip at last: Ah! she is quite a domestic christian—she knocks off the heels of her shoes on a saturday-night to prevent her going to church on the sunday.—She's quite a pious woman—whenever I conceal my money, I always put it in the bible, I am sure my wife will never go there to look for it. I have the finest set of children a man would wish to stick a knife into. There's my son James—he will be a counsel or a bishop, I am certain, he is so wise:—His mother sent him on an errand; turning the corner of a street, he met a lawyer full plump, which knocked him down—the poor boy has never spoke a word of truth ever since. There's my daughter Peg—she certainly will be a queen one day or other—she's so cute:—The other day her mother was ironing the clothes; the iron was red hot; she, like a wise child took hold of it to help her mother—and what do you think? she let it drop in a moment.
