to let fall imposes no labour, is simpler, within the reach of all. To cast away, again, implies a certain interest, a certain animation, even a certain fear; to let fall is absolute indifference, absolute contempt. . . . Some time or other, she said to herself, we all drift into the Sargasso Sea, where the wrecks of all the past thought in the world are caught in the rotting sea-weed. I have escaped from this sea. . . . The only triumphs in this life are negative. I get what I want by wanting something I can give myself. That is my ultimate security. . . . She recalled Gabrielle Dalzant's wise remark to Vernon Lee: We must be prepared to begin life many times afresh. How true! Perhaps, for this new beginning, she would see no more people. Some lines of La Fontaine impinged on her consciousness.
L'innocente beauté des jardins et des jours
Allait faire à jamais le charme de ma vie.
She had a snug, comfortable feeling that all was well. The past was the past and the future was the future. Only the present occupied her, and it delighted her to remember that the present was as blank as a white sheet of paper. She could write on it what she wished. For the moment she was content to contemplate the white sheet. . . .
