depths of earth to the highest heavens, he would willingly climb up and down this pillar till the day of judgment, tearing his flesh to pieces, if he could only by so doing see God for one moment, although the next moment he should have to go back to hell again forever. My God, what am 1 to think of this! If the spirit of evil would think himself happy to have even a momentary glance at the divine countenance, and would be ready to purchase it at the cost of so much suffering, how fortunate am I not? for by using very easy means during my short life I can gain that heavenly vision, not merely for a moment, but for all eternity; nay, if I will, I can enhance its joy and glory and make it greater and greater forever! Should I not be willing to toil and labor incessantly for that object? But, O fool that I am, and forgetful of my own interests! hitherto my chief care and labor have been devoted to temporal things that cannot be of any use to me in eternity, while that infinite good has had but little place in my thoughts! Ah, how many beautiful opportunities I have lost of adding to my eternal glory in heaven! I could have added to it in that illness, in that painful affliction, in that great injustice that I suffered from. All my impatience, my murmurs and complaints against God, my curses and imprecations against those whom I imagined to be the causes of my misfortune, have made these crosses useless to me. I could have increased my glory by the practice of Christian charity and mercy towards the poor and needy, but my avarice and inordinate greed of gain hardened my heart to pity and kept my hand closed to generosity. I could have increased my glory by more frequently mortifying my senses and by voluntary penances, but my self-love hindered me from doing it. I could have increased my glory by more frequently receiving the holy sacraments, but my laziness and sloth stood in my way. I could have increased it by prayer, and often raising my mind to God, but my domestic occupations hardly allowed me to think of Him once during the day. I could have increased it even by my daily labor, and those occupations that I had to spend my time in every day according to the requirements of my state of life, but through want of a good supernatural intention all my labor and work have been fruitless, as far as gaining heaven is concerned. But in future I shall know how to look after my interests better; no minute of the precious time that still remains to me shall go by without merit, that I may always raise my throne in heaven higher and nearer to the throne
