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THE CLEVER APPRENTICE.
THE following story was given me by Mr. A. Copland, schoolmaster, Tyrie, Aberdeenshire. It is originally from Keith, a town and parish in Banffshire.
A shoemaker once engaged an apprentice. A short time after the apprenticeship began, the shoemaker asked the boy what he would call him in addressing him, "Oh, I would just call you master," answered the apprentice. "No," said the master, "you must call me master above all masters."
Continued the shoemaker, "What would you call my trousers?"
"Oh, I would call them trousers."
"No, you must call them struntifers."
"And what would you call my wife?"
"Oh, I would call her mistress."
"No, you must call her the fair Lady Permoumadam."
"And what would you call my son?"
"Oh, I would call him Johnny."
"No, you must call him John the Great."
"And what would you call the cat?"
"Oh, I would call him pussy."
"No, you must call him Great Carle Gropus."
"And what would you call the fire?"
"Oh, I would call it fire."
"No, you must call it Fire Evangelist."
"And what would you call the peatstack?"
"Oh, I would just call it peatstack."
"No, you must call it Mount Potago."
"And what would you call the well?"
"Oh, I would call it well."
