Riddles.[1]
Anne an’ Joey a-ta’ken.
A. A plague! thease cow wont stand a bit,
Noo sooner do she zee me zit
Ageän her, than she’s in a trot,
A runnen to zome other spot.
J. Why ’tis the dog do sceäre the cow,
He worried her a-vield benow.
A. Goo in, Ah! Liplap, where’s your tail![2]
J. He’s off, then up athirt the rail
Your cow there, Anne’s a-come to hand
A goodish milcher.
A. If she’d stand;
But then she’ll steäre an’ start wi’ fright
To zee a dumbledore in flight.
Last week she let the païl a flought,
An’ flung my meal o’ milk half out.
J. Ha! Ha! But Anny, here, what lout
Broke half your small païl’s bottom out?
A. What lout indeed! What, do ye own
The neäme? What dropp’d en on a stwone!
J. Hee! Hee! Well now he’s out o’ trim
Wi’ only half a bottom to en;
“Could you still vill en’ to the brim
An’ yit not let the milk run drough en?”
A. Aye, as for nonsense, Joe, your head
Do hold it all so tight’s a blather;
But if ’tis any good, do shed
It all so leäky as a lather.
Could you vill pails ’ithout a bottom,
Yourself that be so deeply skill’d?
J. Well, ees, I could, if I’d a-got em
Inside o’ bigger woones a-vill’d.
- ↑ This is taken from the first complete edition of Mr. Barns’s poems—that of 1879—as it contains several riddles which are not to be found in the previous editions of 1859 and 1863, in which this poem appeared.
- ↑ To ask a dog where his tail is, is considered to cast the greatest indignity or reproof upon him.