the Tow-path, which the Thames Conservancy pay me a yearly Hire for the Use of, 'for the purpose of towing Boats'; and I am of so amiable a Temperament that, I would have you know, I stand constantly at one of my Windows with a Telescope to spy if any should walk along this Path without towing a Boat, in which Case I presently send a Man to warn them off; and this, Sir, is one of my chiefest Occupations and Delights."
"I send a man to warn them off."
And here I could not but observe how a certain Fellow that passed us in a Boat scowled most lustily (yet not without a certain fear) at my good friend the Riverside Proprietor; and I was about speculating upon this Occurrence, when the good old Man continued:—
"There goes, Sir, a villain."
"There goes, Sir, a Villain of a most froward Temper; for he is by Trade a Waterman; and although I have forbidden him to ferry anybody over to my side of the River, or to fix his Punt in the Stream (for the Bed of the River is my property), and have, indeed, done all in my Power to prevent his gaining a Subsistence; yet I can in no way please him, but he regards me with a most huge disfavour! and, Sir, 'tis the same with the rest of the Watermen here."
It was with difficulty, at this part of the Discourse, that I could refrain from a Tear upon reflecting how so good a Proprietor should be thus maltreated by all around him; and indeed I could well have cried out upon them all for monstrous, ungrateful Varlets. And observing at this time that my good old Friend was taken with a Fit of the Jumps, so that he called out roost vociferously, stamping his Foot the while, I then perceived that his Seizure was occasioned by the Sight of a Tent, which some impertinent Fellow had set up upon his Bank of the Flood; and I learned that such a sight would always bring about in him such a Taking on.
"His seizure was caused by the sight of a tent."
And now my Attention was diverted to a great Number of Notice Boards that were fixed here and there in the River; and on one would be painted "Water and Fishing Private," and on another "DANGEROUS," and on still others "That Way to the Lock," and "Beware of the Weir," and many others; and I perceived that these Notices moved my Friend to a vast and most consuming Enjoyment of himself, in such wise that he fell to chuckling, until I feared he might be in Danger of another Seizure, but, perceiving my Alarm, he whispered me
