Page:The Works of the Rev. Jonathan Swift, Volume 13.djvu/154

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142
LETTERS TO AND FROM

PICKLE HERRING TO MR. FAULKNER[1].


SIRHA[2],


ARE not you the rascal, that makes so free with my family? — Had you once recollected that, graceless and despised as he is, that same serjeant Kite[3] was my brother, and, however marred in the making, was born to be as great a man as myself: had you thought with what vengeance a man in my high station can espouse any one's quarrel, and especially that of a sinking brother, durst you presume to run these lengths? —— Mark what I am going to say; bitter is the sorrow, hot, sour and cutting is the sauce you are to taste after your merry conceits on my poor brother; and what mortal can expect better, that meddles with the very worst of the family of the Pickles? —— Recollect at last and tremble! whom hast thou offended and stirred up to wrath, thou little pitiful swad? —— More would I say to thee, but that I take thee right, I look upon thee only as the foul pipe through which the filth and nastiness of the whole nation is squirted in the teeth of my unfortunate brother, the unlucky graceless dog, that has brought all this on himself; but alas, my brother!

  1. Endorsed by Dr. Swift, "An excellent droll paper."
  2. This humourous letter, although addressed to Mr. Faulkner, was ultimately designed for the entertainment of Dr. Swift.
  3. Bettesworth, serjeant at law, whose character is well known for the assault he made upon Dr. Swift in the year 1733, was frequently persecuted by the young poets under the name of serjeant Kite.

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