and secret memoranda he recorded his inmost thoughts and hopes,—that little volume which amid the wreckage of contemporary literary remains has come down to us intact,—again and again we meet with words telling of his trust in the loving care of the Immortals revered in the Rome of old days, but in whose existence in the later times of the Republic few seem to have believed.
Out of a host of such memoranda scattered in the pages of the Meditations we will quote two or three of his words here.
"With respect to the gods, from what I constantly experience of their power, I am convinced that they exist, and I venerate them" (xii. 28).
The whole of the first book of the Meditations is, in fact, a hymn of gratitude to the gods for their loving care of him.
"Live with the gods," he writes (v. 2-7); "and he who does live with the gods constantly shows to them that his own soul is satisfied with the (lot) which is assigned to him. . . . Zeus has given to every man for his guardian and his guide a portion of himself."
And again (v. 33), "Until that time (thy end) comes, what is sufficient? Why, what else than to venerate the gods and bless them?"
"If the gods have determined about me, and about the things which must happen to me, they have determined well, for it is not easy even to imagine a deity without forethought" (vii. 4. 4).
That the Antonine Emperors knew little really of Christianity is almost certain. The name of Jesus was probably unknown to either Pius or Marcus, and the canonical Gospels evidently had never come before them, although these writings were generally current among the Christian congregations at that time. Once only in his Meditations does Marcus refer to the sect, and then it was clearly with a feeling of dislike and repulsion; their extraordinary readiness to give up their lives for their belief, misliked the calm, stoic Emperor. "The soul," he wrote, "should be ready at any moment to be separated from the body; but this readiness must come from a man's own calm judgment, not from mere