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On his deathbed, he gave his chlldren the very Three Advices which his master had given him on parting:—
Never to take a byeroad when they could follow the highway.
Never to lodge in the house where an old man was married to a young woman.
And, above all, to remember that honesty is the best policy.
SCARCITY OF ASSES,
The rev. Mr. Thom of Govan, riding home from Paisley, on a particular occasion, came up with two gentlemen, heritors of his parish, who had lately been made justices of the peace. They, seeing him well mounted, as usual, were determined to pass a joke on him, and accosted him thus:—“Well, Mr. Thom, you are very unlike your Master; for he was content to ride on an ass.” “An ass!” says Mr. Thom, “there’s no sic a beast to be gotten now-a-days.” “Ay, how’s that?” said they. “Because,” replied Mr. Thom, “they now make them a’ justices of the peace!”
