"Keep up your courage, Lucy. Think of my mother and myself as true friends. We will not forget you".
"Nor will I forget you, Dr. John".
My trunk was now brought in. We had shaken hands; he had turned to go, but he was not satisfied; he had not done or said enough to content his generous impulses.
"Lucy,"—stepping after me—"shall you feel very solitary here?"
"At first I shall".
"Well, my mother will soon call to see you, and, meantime, I'll tell you what I'll do. I'll write—just any cheerful nonsense that comes into my head—shall I?"
"Good, gallant heart!" thought I to myself; but I shook my head smiling, and said, "Never think of it: impose on yourself no such task. You write to me?—you'll not have time."
"Oh! I will find or make time. Good-bye!"
He was gone. The heavy door crashed to: the ax had fallen—the pang was experienced.
Allowing myself no time to think or feel—swallowing tears as if they had been wine—I passed to madame's sitting-room to pay the necessary visit of ceremony and respect. She received me with perfectly well-acted cordiality—was even demonstrative, though brief, in her welcome. In ten minutes I was dismissed. From the salle-à-manger I proceeded to the refectory, where pupils and teachers were now assembled for evening study: again I had a welcome, and one not, I think, quite hollow. That over, I was free to repair to the dormitory.
"And will Graham really write?" I questioned, as I sunk tired on the edge of the bed.
Reason, coming stealthily up to me through the twilight of that long, dim chamber, whispered sedately—"He may write once. So kind is his nature, it may stimulate him for once to make the effort. But it cannot be continued—it may not be repeated. Great were that folly which should build on such a promise—insane that credulity which should mistake the transitory rain-pool, holding in its hollow one fraught, for the perennial spring, yielding the supply of seasons".
I bent my head: I sat thinking an hour longer. Reason still whispered me, laying on my shoulder a withered hand, and frostily touching my ear with the chill blue lips of eld.
