Poems (Odom)/Introspection
INTROSPECTION.
Is it a crime that I love him, A sin that I think of him still,A shame if his image still haunts me Forever against my will?God knows I have tried to forget him, Have struggled to turn from the past,But it seems that the spell of his spirit About all my being is cast.
A spell that I never have broken— Try ever so hard as I may;—They told me I soon would forget him, God help me! I love him to-day.And yet it is years since we parted, That far away evening in spring;Long years since I gave him his letters And took from my finger his ring.
I had wept as I knelt to my father And pled for my lover that day; But coldly he said, as he left me, A daughter of his should obey.That evening at twilight we parted; My life caught the tinge of its gray,The sunshine went from me forever, The shadow lies on me to-day.
Years passed and I wedded to please them, As many a daughter will do—With one who had loved me in childhood, A man who was noble and true.For years we have lived on together, And children hang round on my chair:A boy with dark eyes like his mother, A girl with her father's bright hair.
But oft when the sunlight has faded, And shadows creep over the sky,I dream of the love that was buried But never, no never, could die.It lies like a shrouded immortelle, Craped over with snowy regret;And though it shall never awaken, I know I can never forget.