Valentine. Ease to perswade, my louing Protheus; Home-keeping-youth, haue euer homely wits, Wer't not affection chaines thy tender dayes To the sweet glaunces of thy honour'd Loue, I rather would entreat thy company, To see the wonders of the world abroad, Then (liuing dully sluggardiz'd at home) Weare out thy youth with shapelesse idlenesse. But since thou lou'st; loue still, and thriue therein, Euen as I would, when I to loue begin.
Pro. Wilt thou be gone? Sweet Valentine ad ew, Thinke on thy Protheus, when thou (hap'ly) feest Some rare note-worthy obiect in thy trauaile. Wish me partaker in thy happinesse, When thou do'st meet good hap; and in thy danger, (If euer danger doe enuiron thee) Commend thy grieuance to my holy prayers, For I will be thy beades-man, Valentine.
Val. And on a loue-booke pray for my successe?
Pro. Vpon some booke I loue, Ile pray for thee.
Val. That's on some mallow Storie of deepe loue, How yong Leander crost the Hellespont.
Pro. That's a deepe Storie, of a deeper loue, For he was more then ouer-shooes in loue.
Val. 'Tis true; for you are ouer-bootes in loue, And yet you neuer swom the Hellespont.
Pro. Ouer the Bootes? nay giue me not the Boots.
Val. No, I will not; for it boots thee not.
Pro. What?
Val. To be in loue; where scorne is bought with grones: Coy looks, with hart-sore sighes: one fading moments mirth, With twenty watchfull, weary, tedious nights; If hap'ly won, perhaps a haplesse gaine; If lost, why then a grieuous labour won; How euer: but a folly bought with wit, Or else a wit, by folly vanquished.
Pro. So, by your circumstance, you call me foole.
Ual. So, by your circumstance, I feare you'll proue.
Pro. 'Tis Loue you cauill at, I am not Loue.
Val. Loue is your master, for he masters you; And he that is so yoked by a foole, Me thinkes should not be chronicled for wise.
Pro. Yet Writers say; as in the sweetest Bud, The eating Canker dwels; so eating Loue Inhabits in the finest wits of all.
Val. And Writers say; as the most forward Bud Is eaten by the Canker ere it blow, Euen so by Loue, the yong, and tender wit Is turn'd to folly, blasting in the Bud, Loosing his verdure, euen in the prime, And all the faire effects of future hopes. But wherefore waste I time to counsaile thee That art a votary to fond desire? Once more adieu: my Father at the Road Expects my comming, there to fee me ship'd.
Pro. And thither will I bring thee Valentine.
Val. Sweet Protheus no: Now let vs take our leaue: To Millaine let me heare from thee by Letters Of thy successe in loue; and what newes else Betideth here in absence of thy Friend: And I likewise will visite thee with mine.
Pro. All happinesse bechance to thee in Millaine.
Val. Exit.As much to you at home; and so farewell.
Pro. He after Honour hunts, I after Loue; He leaues his friends, to dignifie them more; I loue my selfe, my friends, and all for loue; Thou Iulia thou hast metamorphis'd me; Made me neglect my Studies, loose my time; Warre with good counsaile; set the world at nought; Made Wit with musing, weake; hart sick with thought.
Sp. Sir Protheus: 'saue you: saw you my Master?
Pro. But now he parted hence to embarque for Millain.
Sp. Twenty to one then, he is ship'd already, And I haue plaid the Sheepe in loosing him.
Pro. Indeede a Sheepe doth very often stray, And if the Shepheard be awhile away.
Sp. You conclude that my Master is a Shepheard then, and I Sheepe?
Pro. I doe.
Sp. Why then my hornes are his hornes, whether I wake or sleepe.
Pro. A silly answere, and fitting well a Sheepe.
Sp, This proues me still a Sheepe.
Pro. True: and thy Master a Shepheard.
Sp. Nay, that I can deny by a circumstance.
Pro. It shall goe hard but ile proue it by another.
Sp. The Shepheard seekes the Sheepe, and not the Sheepe the Shepheard; but I seeke my Master, and my Master seekes not me: therefore I am no Sheepe.
Pro. The Sheepe for fodder follow the Shepheard, the Shepheard for foode followes not the Sheepe: thou for wages followest thy Master, thy Master for wages followes not thee: therefore thou art a Sheepe.
Sp. Such another proofe will make me cry baa.
Pro. But do'st thou heare: gau'st thou my Letter to Iulia?
Sp. I Sir: I (a lost-Mutton) gaue your Letter to her (a lac'd-Mutton) and she (a lac'd-Mutton) gaue mee (a lost-Mutton) nothing for my labour.
Pro. Here's too small a Pasture for such store of Muttons.
Sp. If the ground be ouer-charg'd, you were best sticke her.
Pro. Nay, in that you are astray:'twere best pound you.
Sp. Nay Sir, lesse then a pound shall serue me for carrying your Letter.
Pro. You mistake; I meane the pound, a Pinfold.
Sp. From a pound to a pin I fold it ouer and ouer, 'Tis threefold too little for carrying a letter to your louer
Pn. But what said she?
Sp. I.
Pro. Nod-I, why that's noddy.
Sp. You mistooke Sir: I say she did nod; And you aske me if she did nod, and I say I.
Pro. And that set together is noddy.
Sp. Now you haue taken the paines to set it together, take it for your paines.
Pro. No, no, you shall haue it for bearing the letter.
Sp. Well, I perceiue I must be saine to beare with you.
Pro. Why Sir, how doe you beare with me?
Sp. Marry Sir, the letter very orderly, Hauing nothing but the word noddy for my paines.
Pro. Beshrew me, but you haue a quicke wit.
Sp. And yet it cannot ouer-take your stow purse.
Pro. Come, come, open the matter in briefe; what said she.
Sp. Open your purse, that the money, and the matter may be both at once deliuered.
Pro. Well Sir: here is for your paines: what said she?
Sp. Truely Sir, I thinke you'll hardly win her.
Pro. Why? could'st thou perceiue so much from her?
Sp. Sir, I could perceiue nothing at all from her; No, not so much as a ducket for deliuering your letter: And being so hard to me, that brought your minde; I feare she'll proue as hard to you in telling your minde. Giue her no token but stones, for she's as hard as steele.
Pro. What said she, nothing?
Sp. No, not so much as take this for thy pains: To testifie your bounty, I thank you, you haue cestern'd me In requital whereof, henceforth, carry your letters your selfe; And so Sir, I'le commend you to my Master.
Pro. Go, go, be gone, to saue your Ship from wrack, Which cannot perish hauing thee aboarde, Being destin'd to a drier death on shore: I must goe fend some better Messenger, I feare my lulia would not daigne my lines, Exit.Receiuing them from such a worthlesse post.