Snickerty Nick and the Giant/Scene 2
SCENE II
SPRING
[Dances and sings]
I am little mischief Spring
Getting into everything!
Toorily, oorily, oo.
And when I lift my finger ring
Made of drops of dew,
All the little robins sing,
And the babies go, Goo, Goo.
Cowslip, wake the Dwarf. He has slept nearly seven years.
SPRING
Sweet William, pick her up. She is always slipping! Always slipping!
SPRING
Buttercup, see if you can wake the Dwarf.
BUTTERCUP
Do you like butter-butter-butter?
DWARF
[In a sleepy voice]
Butter? Butter is no good without bread.
BUTTERCUP
[Shaking him]
He doesn’t like butter! I can’t wake him.
SPRING
Ragged Sailor, try what you can do.
RAGGED SAILOR
Ahoy, Nicky! Time you pulled up anchor. Here, shift to Port.
[Rolling him over on his side.]
DWARF
[Sitting up]
Hello, Dicky Dicky Doubt, with your shirt-tail out!
[They all laugh.]
[Nicky rubs his eyes and falls asleep again.]
RAGGED SAILOR
There’s no moving him. He’s aground, he is.
[Sailor fashion he dances a few steps.]
SPRING
Sweet William, you try.
SWEET WILLIAM
See what a funny face he has. He won’t know himself when he wakes up.
[Shaking him]
Wake up! Wake up! I can’t wake him.
BLUE BELL
Let me try. I will tickle him.
Tickely, tickely, on the knee,
If you laugh, you don’t love me.
It’s no use, he doesn’t love me and he won’t wake up.
[The Dwarf snickers in his sleep.]
BUMBLE BEE
[In a low buzzing voice.]
I can wake him. I’ll stick my itchy needle in, in, in.
DANDELION
I’ll play a trick on him, I’ll put his hair in curl papers.
[To the audience]
Do you like curly hair, boys?
[Putting his front locks in curl papers]
Look at Sleeping Beauty.
SPRING
I can wake him. If he has slept seven years he must be hungry. Nicky, Nicky, here’s an apple. Take a bite.
DWARF Did anyone say apples? ApplesP One a penny, two a penny, hot—no—[hesitates]. Personally I prefer them cold. Apples!
[Falls asleep again.]
SPRING
I have an idea.
Trundle him in the wheelbarrow
And dump him on the ground
The way you dumped old Winter
When you didn’t want him round.
CHORUS
Trundle him in the wheelbarrow
And dump him in the brook!
We dumped a fat man in lase week —
Mercy, how he shook!
His face was like a cranky stove
When the fire all goes out,
And you ought to see the fat man now,
He isn’t half so stout.
For we dumped him in the water
And he rolled and rolled and rolled,
He was harder than a snowball,
His double stomach broke off first
And then his double chin—
If the Dwarf can find them floating away,
Perhaps he’ll bring them in,
Or else he’ll hang them on himself
And not be half so thin!
SPRING
[With a dandelion in her mouth]
Trundle him in the wheelbarrow
And dump him on the ground,
The way you dumped me yesterday
And see what I found,
A little picture of the sun
With sunbeams all around.
I’ll stick it in his buttonhole!
[She puts the dandelion in his buttonhole.]
Now you are a little dandy dude.
CHORUS
And we’ll dump him on the ground!
ALL
[Rushing forward]
Let me do it.
DWARF
Is it time to get up? I think I must have had a nap. I had a dream just now. What was it? Have I slept seven years?
[Proudly]
I must see if I am still as beautiful as I was. The Marquise of Magog loved me for my. strange beauty. Beauty is a joy forever.
Extraordinary! This must be some mistake. Is this a face? Well, well, well! Personally I think beauty is only skin deep, fit for women and peacocks. But what is this? A dandelion? I must have been picking flowers in my sleep.
I love to sleep-walk in a dell,
To gather flowers and whistle—
But O, I woke up with a yell
The night I picked a thistle.
I dreamed I kissed a little girl
As pretty as my sister—
But O, she had long finger-nails
And scratched me when I kissed her.
Some people are like thistle-tops;
They beckon and divert you,
And look at you with friendly looks
And smile at you—and hurt you.
Little children peep through the gate
CHILDREN
Nicky, Nicky, will the Giant come back soon? May we come in?
DWARF
[Delighted]
Come in, come in! But the Giant will be home soon and he will eat you up if he catches you.
[Points to the sign.]
FIRST CHILD
Will the Giant come to-day?
DWARF
The Giant said he would be away seven years.
[Looking at his large dangling watch]
It’s seven years to-day. He has gone to see the Cornish Ogre. After the seven years are over he will have said all that he has to say, for his conversation is limited.
SECOND CHILD
He is a selfish old Giant and he doesn’t like us. There aren’t any flowers when he’s here.
THIRD CHILD
[Who is timid]
He won’t let anyone play in his garden, I’m scared. I want to go home.
FIRST CHILD
We like it here and we can run when we hear him coming.
FOURTH CHILD
It is better than playing on the hard road. The road is full of cobble-stones.
DWARF
Quite true, quite true. Cobble-stones gather no moss.
SECOND CHILD
It’s such a nice garden.
DWARF
Yes, geometrically it is very fine. Geometry is very interesting—to those who love it. Some people prefer the encyclopedia. Too many facts, however, stunt the imagination. Personally I prefer poetry.
THIRD CHILD
[Timidly] If he comes back to-day, will he eat us up?
DWARF
He may not come until to-morrow. But if he does come to-day he will gobble you up.
Fee, fi, fo,fum,
He’ll smell the blood of little Tom Thumb,
And yours and yours, and up he’ll come
And stuff you all in his great big tum!
Fee, fi, fo, fum!
[Third child looks frightened and hides behind one of the others.]
FOURTH CHILD
Aren’t you afraid he will eat you up?
DWARF
No, I am very old and tough. He won’t eat me.
THIRD CHILD
Let’s go away.
FIRST CHILD
No, I want to stay and pick some flowers.
THIRD CHILD
You’d better not, the Giant won’t like it.
FIRST CHILD
Well, let’s have a dance, then.
DWARF
All right. Dancing is quite the vogue now. I am thinking of taking it up myself.
Dear me, it came off,
Button, button, who’s got the button?
You got the button? You got the button?
[To a child in the audience.]
I see a little girl and she has a little nose
Right in the middle of her face;
But the nose is gone where a good nose goes—
My button’s in its place.
O, I’ve lost my button, alas, alack!
Little girl, little girl, please give it back!
Button, button, she’s got the button
And will not give it back!
Button, button, she’s got the button—
Somebody give me a tack!
[He tacks the whisk broom in place.]
Whackity, whackity, whack!
CHILDREN
Whackity—whackity—whack!
FIRST CHILD
Let’s play house.
SECOND CHILD
No, we played house yesterday, and Tommy played the mother. But it wasn’t any fun, for Tommy hasn’t any imagination. He doesn’t know how to be a mother.
FOURTH CHILD
Let’s play Puss in the Corner. Who’ll be puss? Nicky, will you?
CHILDREN
Puss, puss, puss
DWARF
No, I am too busy.
“Let's play”
[The Little Boy runs in laughing. The children gather around him and draw him into the center.]
LITTLE BOY
Isn’t the Giant’s garden a lovely garden to play in?
FIRST CHILD
Will you be puss?
LITTLE BOY
Yes, I’ll be puss.
[The giant is heard in the distance.]
CHILDREN
The Giant! The Giant! The Giant is coming; he’ll gobble us up.
GIANT
Who is in my garden? My own garden is my own garden. I will allow nobody to play in it but myself.
CHILDREN
Nicky, Nicky, where shall we hide? If the Giant comes in the front gate he’ll catch us.
DWARF
The Giant always comes in the back gate. Run, run.
[The children run toward the big front gate but they cannot open it.]
CHILDREN
The gate won’t open, Nicky. He’ll catch us, he’ll catch us.
GIANT
[Heard coming nearer and nearer.]
Who is in my garden? I am the Baron Bill-Arron Bomberrum. My own garden is my own garden, and I will allow nobody to play in it but myself.
GIANT
[Looking around astonished]
What has happened. Flowers in my garden? The Cornish Ogre said the flowers never bloomed in his garden and they never would in mine.
[Discovers the little boy lying under the trees, where he has been knocked down by the children in their flight.]
LITTLE BOY
[Holding up his hands]
O, Mr. Giant, help me up. IT have hurt myself.
LITTLE BOY
Thank you, Mr. Giant.
GIANT
[Reflectively] No one ever kissed me before. It feels queer. [Grant puts him down.]
LITTLE BOY
I’m all right now.
I think I will run and play with the children now. Good-bye, Mr. Giant.
GIANT
Don’t you want a flower? You may have one. I’ll pick one for you. Here it is.
LITTLE BOY
Thank you, good Mr. Giant.
GIANT
[Gradually relenting]
Here is another, you may have this. [Aside] No one ever called me “Good Mr. Giant” before.
[Looks at the little boy with a smile.]
LITTLE BOY
Lean down and I will put one in your button-hole and one in mine.
GIANT
Aren’t you a little chap?
LITTLE BOY
Aren’t you a big chap? Little chaps like me like big chaps like you.
GIANT
How would you like to have me give you all my flowers?
LITTLE BOY
O, I don’t want all your flowers. Just some of them.
GIANT
How would you like to have me give you my kingdom and come and live here?
DWARF
[Who has been watching closely]
Now see here, Baron Bill-Arron Bomberrum, throwing bouquets is all very well—but kingdoms
LITTLE BOY
I couldn’t stay here without the other children.
GIANT
No, I don’t want the other children. But I will let you come here and play in my garden whenever you want to. You can always come.
LITTLE BOY
No, I couldn’t do that. I must go now and play with them. Thank you for the flowers.
[Kisses the Giant.]
GIANT
No one ever kissed me before, little chap.
DWARF
Aren’t you going to kiss Nicky, too?
[Little Boy kisses Dwarf.]
LITTLE BOY
Good-bye, Nicky. Good-bye, Giant.
DWARF
A boy named Jack, so I’ve heard tell,
Killed a giant dead.
Mightn’t he have done as well
By loving him instead?
Now here’s a boy who saves the day,
With swords?—no, no, with kisses.
And really there’s no other way
One half so good as this is.
For killing merely makes you blue
And very cross and snappy,
While loving makes not only you
But everybody happy.
And kissing giants is such fun,
They think you’re going to bite,
But as soon as you give ‘em another one,
Everything’s all right.
GIANT
Snickerty Nick, how did the children come here? Did you take down the sign?
DWARF
Yes, I had to. You see the flowers didn’t like the notice. The only people who liked it were Winter and his Gnomes. They thought I was asleep, but I heard Winter tell Northwind why Spring had forgotten this garden.
GIANT
[Stands thinking.]
Nicky, go and tell that little boy if he will come back I will give him my kingdom.
DWARF
What part do I get after all those kicks? Well, well, “uneasy lies the head that wears a crown.” Personally I enjoy the simple life, like the colored man. Don’t you know his song?
GIANT
No, I haven’t heard it.
DWARF
I’m a-buildin’ my house
On a mountain so high,
A good place to wait
For my love to come by.
Go ’way now, all of you,
Leave me alone
On the peacefullest mountain-top
Ever was known.
Go on a-scrimmagin’
All over town
For a stove-pipe hat
And a purple silk gown.
But leave me my cabin
High up as the moon,
Here where my true love
Will come to me soon.
GIANT
Stop your noise, Nicky. Go and find the little boy and bring him back to me.
“What part do I get after all those kicks?”
DWARF
Can’t be done.
GIANT
Not if [ give him all my kingdom?
DWARF
No, he doesn’t want your kingdom.
GIANT
What makes you think that?
DWARF
I don’t think, I just know some things like women. Besides, you heard what he said. He wouldn’t come without the other children.
GIANT
Is that why Spring wouldn’t come here, I wonder?
DWARF
It’s awfully funny and yet it’s true When the children came the flowers came too.
GIANT
Go and find him and tell him all the children can come back and play with him.
DWARF
With me, too. Don’t forget, Nicky.
GIANT
[Taking up the sign.]
Nicky, I’m going to burn this sign up.
DWARF
[Pulling it away from Giant.]
No, no. Give it to me. I can fix it so that when they see it, they’ll come back.
[Dwarf takes the brush and paints letters around the ETT on the sign making it read PETTED.]
How do you like that? “Trespassers will be petted.”
GIANT
Here, take these keys of my kingdom and unlock every gate—so that we can all have the kingdom. But first go and find the little boy.
DWARF
Hurrah!
Children, come back and be petted
And bring all the others,
Your sisters and brothers,
No trespassers now will be etted.
[Exit Dwarf by the gate.]
LITTLE BOY
Oh, I am glad you have changed that old sign.
GIANT
[Lifting the Little Boy into the garden.]
And I’m glad you have come back, little chap.
LITTLE BOY
Show ’em the new sign. Show ’em the new sign, good Mr. Giant.
[The Giant holds the new sign up.]
LITTLE BOY
Come in! Come in! He says you may.
CHILDREN
Hurray! Hurray!
Come in and play,
For the Giant is back and he says you may!
[They join hands and dance round the Giant.]
Dipsey-wipsey,
Tiddledy ipsey,
Snickerty says we may!
DWARF
Hurray! Hurray!
Hurray! Hurray!
Dipsey-wipsey,
Tiddledy ipsey,
Snickerty says we may.
CURTAIN
[The Dwarf puts his head out between the curtains and smiles. Then he comes through and holds up a bunch of golden keys.]
DWARF
Now ladies and gentlemen, here are the keys,
I beg you to do me this courtesy, please:—
Unlock every door, every gate with these keys,
Every gate, every door in the kingdom!
And then I shall ask one more favour of you!
Please hand the keys on just as soon as you’re through
To whoever you see in a kingdom!
To unlock every garden and make them all free
One garden for children and giants—and me—
Oh, open your hearts, make them ample and free—
For that is the key to the kingdom!
THE END
“Dipsey, ipsey, tiddley ipsey”