Songs and Lyrics (Lehrer)/Sociology
SOCIOLOGY
words by Tom Lehrer
music by Irving Berlin
("Choreography" from the movie White Christmas)
1.
Strange
Is the change
They are trying to arrange
Today in Sociology.
Fanatics
In their attics
Are learning mathematics
Just for Sociology.
Persuasion
By equation
They all feel is much more satisfactory.
In an ivory steeple,
Far away from all people,
They do research in Sociology.
2.
Guys
Who wrote lies
Now present them in disguise
(A cinch in Sociology).
A tract
Quite abstract
Without one single fact
Is splendid Sociology.
Birds
Who used words
Now all talk in terms of x and y and z.
They can take one small matrix
And really do great tricks
All in the name of Sociology.
3.
Joes
Who wrote pros
Now write algebra. Who knows?
It may be Sociology.
They're
Everywhere
Full of sigma and chi-square
And full of --- Sociology.
They consult
Sounding occult
Talking like a mathematics Ph. D.
They can snow all their clients
By calling it "science"
Although it's only Sociology.
4. (extra verse)
Kind souls
Who took polls
Now pursue much higher goals
Today in Sociology
Don't condemn
Any of them
Hand in hand with IBM
They're doing Sociology.
Graphs
Once got laughs
But now calculus you'll find is SOP.
Folks who once were empirical
Now all get lyrical
Over the change in Sociology.