Tales and Legends from the Land of the Tzar/An Angry Wife
AN ANGRY WIFE.
There was once an angry wife, who—as my young readers may well suppose—lived unhappily with her husband. She never obeyed him, and always did exactly what he told her not to do. She made him get up early to bake the cakes and do all the cooking, while she slept three times as long as was good for her!
One day, when her husband was busy baking cakes, she cried out,—
"You must not eat any of those cakes, for you don't deserve to have them!"
"In that case, I don't see why I should bake them," was his reply; "come and do them yourself."
But the angry wife was by no means anxious to give herself the trouble, so she replied quickly that he could have fifty, on condition that he would eat them up at once, without stopping. However, the old man did not quite see why he should make himself ill to please his wife; so having a will of his own he left the cakes to look after themselves, and went for a stroll in the forest, and gathered some strawberries for his lunch; anything was better than eating at home with his angry wife!
As he walked about thinking how he could get rid of his wife, he came upon a pit covered over with strawberry leaves. He stopped in front of it, and said to himself,—
"Because I live with so bad-tempered a wife my whole life is a misery. I can stand it no longer, but will try by some means or other to shut her up in this pit; it will teach her to behave better in future."
So he returned home, and told his wife,—
"Don't go into the forest for strawberries."
"I certainly shall, if I choose."
"Well, you had better not, for I have found a place where there are some beautiful large strawberries, but under them is a pit."
"I shall go at once and pick the strawberries off that very spot, and shan't give you one of them. There, now! take me and show me the place this moment, come!"
Ofif they both went to the forest; the man showed the place to his wife and asked her again not to go near it, knowing all the time that the harder he begged, the more certain she was to go. When the angry wife beheld all the delicious strawberries round the pit, she jumped for joy, and rushing in among the leaves over the pit she went to the bottom.
The old man, when he saw that his wife was safely disposed of, for the present at least, went home, and for some time lived in peace and harmony with himself. One day it struck him that he might go and look his wife up in the pit, and ask her how she liked her new home, and whether it agreed with her better, adding that if she had improved in her temper he would draw her up again by a rope.
When he got to the pit he began calling to his wife, but receiving no answer, he thought he would let down the rope; he did so, and soon began pulling it up again, but what was his astonishment and horror, when he saw, instead of his wife, a little demon holding on to the end of the rope. The man was just about to let the rope drop down again, when the demon said, in a very weak little voice,—
"Good man, have pity on me, I am only a poor innocent little devil, and will not harm you; take me out of this dreadful pit, and let me run about the wide world, and I will certainly reward you and make you a rich man; but to stay in this pit is death to me now, for an angry wife came down to us and ate up all my companions, I alone escaped, thank goodness, though as it is I am only half-alive!"
The man was sorry for the poor little demon, for he knew what kind of a woman his wife was, having had a big dose of her himself. So he drew the little creature up.
"Well, good man!" said the devil, "now I shall keep my promise, and make your fortune for you. Come with me into the town, and when I go into people, you play at being a great doctor and drive me out!"
The man agreed to this proposal, and away they went; the demon, running on in front, began tormenting men, women, and childen, while the man cast him out with great success. So that in a very short time he was received with open arms by everybody, rich and poor, small and great, and became a very rich man.
At last the demon came to him, and said,—
"I have been to every house in the kingdom, and have possessed every one, while you have cast me out and got handsomely paid for doing so; now I intend to torment the king's daughter, but mind, don't you come near the palace, even if you are called for; don't try and heal the young princess, or—beware!"
The man promised to obey, and the little devil went to the palace and began tormenting the king's daughter. The princess was in despair. She cried, she tore her beautiful hair, and allowed no one to come near her. At last the king, who had heard of the wonderful man who was able to cast out evil spirits, ordered his servants to bring our friend before him. At first, the man would not come, but the king got so furious that the man was at last obliged to go to the palace.
"Cure my daughter," cried the king, "or off goes your head!"
This was rather too much. What was our unfortunate friend to do? He feared the demon, and he feared the king. Suddenly an idea struck him, and he told all the courtiers, all the servants, and all the people in the streets, to run about and call out in a loud voice, "Away! away! the angry wife is coming! The angry wife is coming!" while he himself went into the princess's chamber.
"What, you here after all!" exclaimed the little demon, when he saw the man enter, "wait till I get you alone, my friend! What did I tell you only the other day? I suppose you have forgotten. Well, I shall soon make you remember! Just you wait a moment!"
The man, who felt far from comfortable, tried hard not to appear frightened, and said laughingly,—
"Not so fast, my young friend. I have only come here to warn you. It seems that as no one else would cast you out, the king has sent for the angry wife, and she is coming to eat you up! Listen! do you hear the people? She has evidently arrived; fly for your life, my friend!"
The moment the little demon heard these words, he sprang out of the princess, and ran to the window, where he was greatly alarmed at seeing all the people running about, crying out,—
"Away! away! The angry wife is coming! The angry wife is coming! Run for you lives!" and so on.
The demon stood looking with his eyes very wide open, and his tail up in the air, like a devil out of his senses. At last he turned to the man and asked,—
"Good man, my dear good friend, tell me, oh tell me, what on earth I am to do, and where I am to go and hide myself!"
"Go," said our cunning friend, "to the pit where you were born, for if my angry wife has once got out, she will be in no particular hurry to get in again; so take my advice and go down."
The little devil did not wait to be told twice; but after thanking the man for his good advice, and his apparent great friendship for him, and also after telling him hurriedly that if ever he came to the pit himself, he would always be sure to find a warm welcome,—the little devil ran as hard as his legs would carry him straight to the forest, and, throwing himself into the pit, was heard of no more.
The princess at once recovered her health, and was herself again; while our friend the man was handsomely rewarded, and spent the rest of his life in the palace near the king, his master, with whom he became a great favourite.
As for the angry wife, she never made her appearance in this world again.