The Book of Scottish Song/The Old Maid
The Old Maid.
[This humorous ditty, to the tune of "Woo'd and married and a'," was composed about the year 1826 or 1827 by a young probationer of the Church of Scotland, a native of Ayrshire, who is now settled as minister of a parish in Aberdeenshire.]
Our Girzy was now thirty-six,
Though some rather mair did her ca',
And ane quite sae auld to get married,
Has little or nae chance ava.
And Girzy, aft thinking on this,
Lang sighs frae her bosom wad draw;
Oh, is it not awfu' to think
I may not be married ava!
No to be married ava,
No to be married ava;
Oh, is it not awfu' to think,
I may not be married ava!
For ilka young lass that can brag
Of her ha'eing a lover or twa,
Will haud out her finger and say,
That body has got nane ava.
And then when they a' get married,
Their husbands will let them gang braw,
While they laugh at auld maids like mysell,
For no getting ony ava.
No to be married, &c.
Some wives that are wasters o' men,
Wear dune naething less than their twa;
But this I wad haud as a crime,
That ought to be punished by law.
For are they no muckle to blame,
When thus to themsells they tak' a'?
Ne'er thinking o' mony an auld maid,
That's no to be married ava.
No to be married, &c.
But as for the men that get wives—
E'en though it were some ayont twa,
I think they should aye be respeckit
For helping sae mony awa'.
But as for the auld bach'lor bodies,
Their necks every ane I could thraw,
For what is the use of their lives,
Gin no to be married ava?
No to be married, &c.
Oh, gin I could get but a husband,
E'en though he were never sae sma',
Just gi'e me a husband, I'll tak' him,
Though scarce like a mannie ava.
Come soutor, come tailor, come tinkler,
Oh come ony ane o' ye a'!
Come gi'e me a bode e'er sae little,
I'll tak' it and never sae na'.
No to be married, &c.
Come deaf, or come dumb, or come cripple,
Wi' ae leg, or nae legs ava,
Or come ye wi' ae e'e, or nae e'e,
I'll tak' ye as ready's wi' twa.
Come young, or come auld, or come doited,
Oh come and just tak' me awa';
Far better be married to something,
Than no to be married ava.
No to be married. &c.
Now, lads, if there's ony amang ye,
Wad like just upon me to ca',
Ye'll find me no ill to be courted,
For shyness I ha'e thrown't awa'.
And if ye should want a bit wifie,
Ye ken to what quarter to draw;
And e'en should we no mak' a bargain,
Ye'll at least get a kissie or twa.
No to be married, &c.