The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman/Volume 5/Chapter 8

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CHAP. VIII.

Stay—I have a small account to settle with the reader, before Trim can go on with his harangue.—It shall be done in two minutes.

Amongst many other book-debts, all of which I shall discharge in due time,—I own myself a debtor to the world for two items,—a chapter upon chamber-maids and button-holes, which, in the former part of my work, I promised and fully intended to pay off this year: but some of your worships and reverences telling me, that the two subjects, especially so connected together, might endanger the morals of the world,—I pray the chapter upon chamber-maids and button-holes may be forgiven me,—and that they will accept of the last chapter in lieu of it; which is nothing, an't please your reverences, but a chapter of chamber-maids, green-gowns, and old hats.

Trim took his off the ground,—put it upon his head,—and then went on with his oration upon death, in manner and form following.