The Three Advices/Scarcity of Asses

by Anonymous

SCARCITY OF ASSES,

The rev. Mr. Thom of Govan, riding home from Paisley, on a particular occasion, came up with two gentlemen, heritors of his parish, who had lately been made justices of the peace. They, seeing him well mounted, as usual, were determined to pass a joke on him, and accosted him thus:—“Well, Mr. Thom, you are very unlike your Master; for he was content to ride on an ass.” “An ass!” says Mr. Thom, “there’s no sic a beast to be gotten now-a-days.” “Ay, how’s that?” said they. “Because,” replied Mr. Thom, “they now make them a’ justices of the peace!”