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38 ONOE A WEEK, f7ou7 7, 1800. all that makes life delightful to the feelings and | test to my thinking, was somewhat hardly used, the senses, and now sll that is quite, quite gone ! | there would have been no broken victuals, no Were I to knock at the door now, and_race up | ssvoury scraps for starving Lazarus. But these sre the atairs an of old, Betty wonld be overcome, and | knotty points ;—ws had beat fall back on tha the excellent head of the family inside would give | London season. me in charge on the suspicion of having deaign | I lay mo great stress on that false start before against the great-coats and umbrellas. No poetry | Easter. It is but a foretazte, or rather a whet in London! No poetry save a man i sitting and | before the banquet; indeed it might more aptly ancering on a swab of wet moss—a Highland | be compared to the tuning-up of the fiddle before piper being a6 hand with one of those horrid in- | Signor Costa takes his seat, and with ons wave of struments of torture applied to his hard, horny | his magic wand opens the Palace of Music at & lps! Why, one could write & sonnet about South | blow. If any one should be disposed to take a Audley Street. Little turn to the French capital before the oocur- But if London at all times is better than any | rence of the Easter winter—of late years w have

other place you could name, what s it not during | commonly had anow a6 that geazon—if there wore the season, when every joy is atita climax, and | not room for actusl commendation, you would | when all your friends snd_scquaintances from all | soarcely think him worthy of absolute blame, Th is parts of the country, and from all parte of the | thetimewhensecond and third-ratesingersestablish continent, and from all parts of the world, come | their failnros as facta on the operatic stage. Tt is dropping in thick a8 gnats used o be in summer | the time when theatrioal managers depend upon evenings—when there were summor evenings, and | the fag-ends of worn-out themes, and try the there were gnats. I know that some unneigh- | patience of the public whilst they are burnishing bourly sort of people will have it that London is | up their tinsel and spangles for fresh and unwonted most delighttul in Septeraber, when everybody is | effects. Tt is a timo when chabby-gentes peopls | out of town, and the Hindu sweeper in Saint | who but wish to apread a roport about their | James's Square leaves off peddling with the unpro- | vicinage that they have been up to London * for | fitablo mud at his crossing, and, folding his arms | the season,” spend a fortnight or thres weeks in across his breast, meekly gives in to Budhism. | town, and return to their usual and congenial

i Of course London is pleasant in September when | hypocrisies, under the false impression that they the seat of empire is your own—but it is pleasant | are not found out. There ia little good, snd much a8 sleep in after toil, or vight sfter day. Ilike, |bad about thet false-birth, the London sesson ' a8 well as any man, to have the library in the | before Esster. The rexl people will not keep club entirely to myself, and to moralise in the | open-houses for shadows. Those who constantly || denerts of OId Bond. Street, but human nature | inhabit London, mainiain the over tenor of thair hes also ite social and its gorgeous aide. I |way, and will not enffor themselves to be drawn have & rich vein of duchesses in my mind, | into demonstrations which can have uo substantisl which I can open up during the London season. | results. The country pilgrims have not yeb If ever thers was loiterce by old bookshops, and & | arrived. They wisely stop down in their own lover of old erinkum-crankums of every kind, I am | domains, and refuse %o bear their part in an idlo that idle, urcless person : but of all the fair sights | mockery. You may notice that this is the time which the London strects oan show, the faiest | chosen by tho astuter shopkeepers for calling to are those beautiful young maids and matrons | their aid the akill of the house-painter and ho, as the season grows forvont, are drawn about | decorator. They have put their cleanings and in. their triumphal cars by borses auch as Groece | burnishings off $ill the last moment, that they never dresmed of, for all the testimony of her | may show in full brilliancy when it ia most need- Elgin marbles. How all that human ingonuity | ful to be Lrillant. They know what can bo could contrive, or buman industry procure from | sccomplished in threo weeks by & combination all quarters of the globs, has been lavished on | between inclement skiss and London *blacks,” these Summer Queons ; and how they taks it as a | and will nob make their running Hl the critical matter of courss, as the roav does ita fragrance, | moment, Their gains bofore Easter are nothing or the humaming-bird the iridescence of it | bub tributes from country cousins, not worthy of restless wings! What s pity it would be if | serious account. humanity could be at all mown down to & desd | When the resl neason hss set in, it secms as level like a lnwn, and tho hesvens, in place of con- | though all perzons who can do anything better taining the greater and the lesaer glories, were all | than their fellows, in any quarter of the globe, li up with myriads of farthing candles, all of | had descended like s swarm of locusts upon the equal dimness. The Londoner who has learned | town. The Monaiours, and the Siguori, and the %o enjoy his season properly, and to linger over | Herrs, fock to our ahores with tho hops of levy- ita flavour, as a true scholar in wines would trifle | ing tribute from the Londoners in ome form or with » beaded glass of amber Seuterne, and bleas | another. Ono gentleman has & marvellons us de the Chitezu-Yquem whero it was cradled into | poitrine ; suother produces musical sounds by sweetness, knows well what pleasures can be | merely thumping his chin; s third can do more extracted from the mere contemplation of those | in the conjuring way than has ever boan thought mors heroic exemplurs of humanity who glide | poazible before ; a fourth rolies for anceess upon about the town in such Elysian guiso. Aroh- | the intelligent aotion of a set of well trained bishop Whately and the economisis are right : | poodles ; n fifth will cure all your ailments by you must have ducheazes, that it may be well | throwing her- or him- zelf into s meamerio con- with the boggars ; bub for poor Dives, who [ pro- | dition, and preceribing apt remedies for your ”


Tesseract 3

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all that makes life delightful to the feelings and I test to my thinking, was somewhat hardly used, the senses, and now all that is quite, quite gone ! i there would have been no broken victuals, no Were I to knock at the door now, and race up savoury scraps for starving Lazarus. But these are the stairs as of old, Betty would be overcome, and knotty points ;—-we had best fall back on the the excellent head of the family inside would give London season. me in charge on the suspicion of having a design I lay no great stress on that false start before against the great-coats and umbrellas. No poetry Easter. It is but a foretaste, or rather a whet in London ! No poetry save a man is sitting and before the banquet; indeed it might more aptly sneezing on a swab of wet moss—a Highland be compared to the tuning-up of the fiddle before piper being at hand with one of those horrid in Signor Costa takes his seat, and with one wave of struments of torture applied to his hard, horny ‘ his magic wand opens the Palace of Music at a lips ! Why, one could write a sonnet about South blow. If any one should be disposed to take a little turn to the French capital before the occur Audley Street. But if London at all times is better than any , rence of the Easter winter—of late years we have other place you could name, what is it not during commonly had snow at that season—if there were the season, when every joy is at its climax, and not room for actual commendation, you would when all your friends and acquaintances from all ‘ scarcely think him worthy of absolute blame. It is parts of the country, and from all parts of the the time when second and third-rate singers establish continent, and from all parts of the world, come their failures as facts on the operatic stage. It is dropping in thick as gnats used to be in summer the time when theatrical managers depend upon evenings—when there were summer evenings, and the fag-ends of worn-out themes, and try the there were gnats. I know that some unneigh patience of the public whilst they are burnishing bourly sort of people will have it that London is up their tinsel and spangles for fresh and unwonted most delightful in September, when everybody is effects. It is a time when shabby-genteel people out of town, and the Hindu sweeper in Saint who but wish to spread a report about their James’s Square leaves off peddling with the unpro vicinage that they have been up to London “for fitable mud at his crossing, and, folding his arms the season,” spend a fortnight or three weeks in across his breast, meekly gives in to Budhism. town, and return to their usual and congenial Of course London is pleasant in September when hypocrisies, under the false impression that they the seat of empire is your own—-but it is pleasant are not found out. There is little good, and much as sleep is after toil, or night after day. I like, bad about that false-birth, the London season as well as any man, to have the library in the before Easter. The real people will not keep club entirely to myself, and to moralise in the open-houses for shadows. Those who constantly deserts of Old Bond Street, but human nature

inhabit London, maintain the even tenor of their

has also its social and its gorgeous side.

way, and will not suffer themselves to be drawn into demonstrations which can have no substantial results. The country pilgrims have not yet

have a rich

vein

of duchesses

I

in my mind,

which I can open up during the London season. If ever there was a loiterer by old bookshops, and a lover of old crinkum-crankums of every kind, I am that idle, useless person : but of all the fair sights which the London streets can show, the fairest

are those beautiful young maids and matrons who, as the season grows fervent, are drawn about

in their triumphal cars by horses such as Greece never dreamed of, for all the testimony of her Elgin marbles. How all that human ingenuity could contrive, or human industry procure from all quarters of the globe, has been lavished on

arrived.

They wisely stop down in their own

domains, and refuse to bear their part in an idle mockery. You may notice that this is the time chosen by the astuter shopkeepers for calling to their aid the skill of the house-painter and decorator. They have put their cleanings and burnishings off till the last moment, that they may show in full brilliancy when it is most need Iful to be brilliant. ’l‘hey know what can be accomplished in three weeks by a combination between inclement skies and London “blacks,”

these Summer Queens ; and how they take it as a matter of course, as the rose does its fragrance,

and will not make their running till the critical moment. Their gains before Easter are nothing

or the humming-bird the iridescence of its restless wings! What a pity it would be if

but tributes from country cousins, not worthy of

humanity could be at all mown down to a dead level like a lawn, and the heavens, in place of con

When the real season has set in, it seems as

serious account.

though all persons who can do anything better taining the greater and the lesser glories, were all than their fellows, in any quarter of the globe, lit up with myriads of farthing candles, all of had descended like a swarm of locusts upon the equal dimness. The Londoner who has learned town. The Monsieurs, and the Signori, and the to enjoy his season properly, and to linger over Herrs, flock to our shores with the hope of levy its flavour, as a true scholar in wines would trifle ing tribute from the Londoners in one form or with a beaded glass of amber Sauterne, and bless another. One gentleman has a marvellous at de the Chateau-Yquem where it was cradled into pm’t1-ine; another produces musical sounds by sweetness, knows well what pleasures can be merely thumping his chin; a third can do more extracted from the mere contemplation of those in the conjuring way than has ever been thought more heroic exemplars of humanity who glide possible before; a fourth relies for success upon about the town in such Elysian guise. Arch the intelligent action of a set of well trained bishop Whately and the economists are right: poodles; a fifth will cure all your ailments by you must have duchesses, that it may be well throwing her- or him- self into a mesmeric con with the beggars ; but for poor Dives, who I pro dition, and prescribing apt remedies for your

Google Cloud Vision

[edit]

ONCE A WEEK JuLT 7, 1800 all that makea life delightful to the feelings and test to my thinking, was somewhat hardły used, the senseB, and now all that is quite, quite gone 1 there would have been no broken victuals, no Were I to knock at the door now, and race up aavoury acraps for starving Lazarus. But these ara the stairs as of old, Betty would be overcome, and knotty points;-we had beat fall back on the the ercellent head of the family inside would give London season me in charge against the great-caate and umbrellas. No poetry Easter. It is but a foretaste, or rather a whet in London No poetry save meezing piper being at hand with one of those horrid in Signor Costa takes his Beat, and with one wave of atruments of torture applied to his hard, horny his magic wand opens the Palace of Music at a lips! Why, one could write a Bonnet about South blow. If any one should be disposed to take a Audley Street. Bat if London at all times is better than any rence of the Eaater winter of late years we have other place you could name, what is it not during commonly had snow at that season-if there were the Beason, when every joy is at ita climax, and not room for actual commendation, you would when all your friends and acquaintances from all acarcely think him worthy of abaolute blame. It is parts of the country, and from all parts of the thetime when second and third-rate singersestablish continent, and from all parts of the world, come their failnros as facta on the operatic stage. dropping in thick aa gnats used to be in Bummer the time when theatrical managers depend upon evenings when there were summer evenings, and the fag-ends of worn-out theumes, and try the there were gnata. I know that some unneigh. patience of the public whilat they bourly Bort of people will have it that London is up their tineel and spanglea for fresh and unwonted most delightful in September, when everybody is affects. It is a time when shabby-genteel people out of town, and the Hindu sweeper in Saint who but wish to spread a report about their James's Square leaves off peddling with the nnpro- vicinage that they have been up to London "for fitable mud at his crossing,, and, folding his arms aCrosB his breast, meekly gives in to Budhism. town, and return to their usual and congenial Of course London is pleasant in September when hypocrisies, under the false impression that they the seat of ampire is your own-but it is pleasant are not found out. There ia little good, and much sleep is after toil, or night after day. I like, bad about that false birth, the London season as well as any man, to have the library in the before Easter. The real people will not keep club entirely to myself, and to moralise in the open-houses for shadows. Those who constantly deaerta of Old Bond Street, but human nature inhabit London, maintain the even tenor of their has also ita Bocinl and its gorgeous aide. Iway, and will not enffer themselves to be drawn have a rich vein of duchesses in my mind, into demonstratione which can have no substantial which I can open up during the London season. results. If ever there was a loiterer by old bookshopa, and a arrived. They wisely atap down in their own lover of old crinkum-crankums of every kind,, I am domain8, and refuse to bear their part in an idle that idle, useless person: but of all the fair sighta mockery. You may notice that this is the time which the London streets can show, the fairest chosen by the astuter shopkeepers for calling to are those beantiful young maids and matrons their aid the kill of the house-painter and who, as the season grows fervent, are drawn about decorator. They have put their cleanings and in their triumphal cara by horses auch aa Greece burnishings off till the last moment, that they never dreamed of, for all the testimony of her may ahow in full brilliancy when it ia moat need- Elgin marbles. How all that human ingenuity ful to be rilliant. They know what can be could contrive, or human industry procure from accomplished in three weeks by a combination all quarters of the globe, has been lavished on between inclement skiea and London blaoks, these Sumrmer Queens; and how they take it as a and will not make their running tilI the critical matter of course, as the rose does it fragrance, moment. Their gains before Easter are nothing or the humming-bird the iridescence of its but tributes from country couains, not worthy of reatless winga What a humanity could be at all mown down to a dead level like a laWn, and the heavens, in place of con though all persons who can do anything better taining the greater and the lesser glories, lit up with myriads of farthing candles, all of had descended like a swarm of locusts upon the equal dimneas to enjoy his season ita davour, as a true acholar in wines would trifle ing tribute from the Londonera in one form or with a beaded glass of amber Sauterne, and bleas another. One gentleman has a marvellous ut de the Chateau-Yquem where it was cradled into poitrine; auother prodnces musical sounda by sweetness, knowa well what pleaaures can bemerely thumping his chin; a third can do more extracted from the mere contemplation of thoee in the conjuring way than has ever been thought more heroic exemplars of humanity who glide possible before; a fourth relies for succeas upon about the town in such Elysian guise. biahop Whately and the economists are you must have duchessea, that it may be wellthrowing her- or him- self into a mesmeric con- with tlhe beggars; but for poor Dives, who I pro dition, and preacribing apt remedies for yonr on the suspicion of having design I lay no gresat streas on that false start before man is sitting and before the banquet; indeed it might more aptly on a swab of wet moss-a Highland be compared to the tuning-up of the fiddle before little turn to the French capital before the occur- It is burnishing are the season," spend fortnight or three weeks in The country pilgrims have not yet pity it would be if serious account. When the real Beason has Bet in, it seema as were all than their fellows, in any quarter of the globe, The Londoner who has learned town. The Monsieurs, and the Signori, and the properly, and to linger overHerra, ock to our ahorea with the hope of levy Arch the intelligent action of a set of well trained right: poodles ; fifth will oure all your ailmenta by Google Digitized by

_Google Drive

[edit]

88 ONCE A WEEK. (JOLT 7, 1800. HEIGHT all that makes life delightful to the feelings and test to my thinking, was somewhat hardly used, the senses, and now all that is quite, quite gone 1 l there would have been no broken victuale, no Were I to knock at the door now, and race up savoury acraps for starviag Lazarus. But these are the stairs as of old, Betty would be overcome, and knotty points we had beat fall back on the the excellent head of the family inside would give Loudon season, me in charge on the suspicion of having a design I lay no great stress on that false start before against the great coats and umbrellas. No poetry Easter. It is but a foretagte, or rather a whet in London! No poetry save a man is sitting and before the banquet; indeed it miglit more aptly sneezing on a swab of wet moge-a Highland | be compared to the tuning-up of the fiddle before piper being at hand with one of those horrid in. Signor Costa takes his Beat, and with one wave of atraments of torture applied to his hard, horny his magic wand opens the Palace of Music at a lips! Why, one could write a bonnet about South blow. If any one should be disposed to take a Audley Street. Little turn to the French capital before the occur. But if London at all times is better than any rence of the Easter winter of late years we have other place you could name, what is it not during commonly had grow at that season—if there were the season, when every joy is at ita climax, and not room for actaal commendation, you would when all your friends and acquaintances from all scarcely think him worthy of absolute blame. It is parts of the country, and from all parts of the the time when second and third-rate gingers establish continent, and from all parts of the world, come their failures as facta on the operatic stage. It is dropping in thick as gnate used to be in summer the time when theatrical managers depend upon evenings—when there were summer evenings, and the fag-ends of worn-out themes, and try the there were gate. I koor that some uaneigh. patience of the public whilst they are burnishing bourly sort of people will have it that London is up their tinsel and spangles for fresh and unwonted most delightful in September, when everybody is affecta. It is a time when shabby-genteel people out of town, and the Hindu sweeper in Saint who but wish to spread a report about their James's Square leaves off peddling with the unpro- | vicinage that they have been up to London " for fitable mud at his crossing, and, folding his arms the season," spend a fortnight or three weeks in ACTOBB his breast, meekly gives in to Budhism. town, and return to their wual and congenial Of course London is pleasant in September when hypocrisies, ander the false impression that they the seat of empire is your own—but it is pleasant are not found out. There is little good, and much as sleep is after toil, or night after day. I like, bad about that false-birth, the London season 89 well as any man, to have the library in the before Easter. The real people will not keep club entirely to myself, and to moralise in the open houses for shadows. Those who constantly deserts of Old Bond Street, but human nature inhabit London, maintain the even tenor of their has also ita social and its gorgeous aide. I way, and will not anffor themselves to be drawn have a rich vein of duchesses in my mind, into demonstrations which can have no substantial which I can open up during the London season, results. The country pilgrims have not yet If ever there was a loiterer by old bookshops, and a arrived. They wisely atop down in their own lover of old crinkum-crankums of every kind, I am domains, and refuse to bear their part in an idle that idle, uselese person : but of all the fair sighta mockery. You may notice that this is the time which the London streets can gbow, the fairest chosen by the astuter shopkeepers for calling to are those beautiful young maida and matrons their aid the skill of the house-painter and who, as the season grows fervont, are drawn about decorator. They have put their cleanings and in their triumphal cars by horses auch as Greece burnishings off till the last moment, that they never dreamed of, for all the testimony of her may show in full brilliancy when it is most needElgin marbles. How all that human ingenuity ful to be brilliant. They know what can be could contrive, or human industry procure from accomplished in three week by a combination all quarters of the globe, has been lavished on between inclement skies and London “blaoks." these Summer Queens; and how they take it as and will not make their running till the critical matter of course, as the rose does ita fragrance, moment. Their grids before Easter are nothing or the hummingbird the iridescence of its but tributes from country couains, not worthy of retless winge! What a pity it would be if serious account. humanity could be at all mown down to a dead. When the real season has set in, it seems as level like a lawn, and the heavens, in place of con. though all persons who can do anything better taining the greater and the legeer glories, were all than their fellowe, in any quarter of the globe, lit up with myriads of farthing candles, all of had descended like & swarm of locusta upon the equal dimness. The Londoner who has learned town. The Monsieurs, and the Signori, and the to enjoy his season properly, and to linger over Herra, flock to our ahorea with the hope of levyita flavour, va trne scholar in wines would trifle ing tribute from the Londoners in one form or with a beaded glass of amber Sauterne, and bleas another. One gentleman has a marvellous ut de the Château-Yquem where it was cradled into poitrine; atiother produces musical sounds by sweetness, know well what pleasures can be merely thumping his chin; a third can do more extracted from the mero contemplation of those in the conjuring way than he ever been thought more heroic exemplar of humanity wlio glide possible before I fourth relies for success upon about the town in buch Elysian guise. Arch the intelligent action of a set of well trained bishop Whately and the economista are right : poodies; a fifth will cure all your ailments by you must have duchesses, that it may be well throwing her or him-self into e mesmerio conwith the beggars; but for poor Dives, who I pro- dition, and prescribing apt remedies for your Digitized by Google

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all that makes life delightfu] to the feelings and the senses, and now all that is quite, quite gone ! Were T to knock at the door now, and race iip the stairs as of old, Betty would be overcome, and the excellent head of the family inside would give me in charge on the suspicion of having a design against the great-coats and umbrellas. No poetry in London ! No poetry save a man is sitting and sneezing on a swab of wet moss — a Highland piper being at hand with one of those horrid in- struments of torture api)lied to his hard, homy lips ! Why, one coidd write a sonnet about South Andley Street.

But if Loudon at all times is better than any other place you coidd name, what is it not during the season, when ever3 joy is at its climax, and when all your friends and acquaintances from all parts of the country, and from all parts of the continent, and from all parts of the world, come dropping in thick as gnats iised to be in summer evenings — when there were summer evenings, and there were gnats. I know that some ixnneigh- bourly sort of people will have it that London is most delightful in September, when everybody is out of town, and the Hindu sweeper in Saint James's Square leaves off peddling with the unpro- fitable mud at his crossing, and, folding his arms across his breast, meekly gives in to Budhism. Of course London is pleasant in September when the seat of empire is your owti — but it is pleasant as sleep is after toil, or night after day. I like, as well as any man, to have the library in the club entirely to myself, and to moralise in the deserts of Old Bond Street, but human nature has also its social and its gorgeous side. I ha^•e a rich vein of duchesses in my mind, which I can open up during the London season. If ever there was a loiterer by old bookshops, and a lover of old crinkum-crankums of every kind, I am that idle, useless person : but of all the fair sights which the London streets can show, the fairest are those beautiful young maids and matrons who, as the season grows fervent, are drawn about in their triiimphal cars by horses such as Greece never dreamed of, for all the testimony of her Elgin marbles. How all that human ingenuity could contrive, or human industry procure from all quarters of the globe, has been lavished on these Summer Queens ; and how they take it as a matter of course, as the rose does its fragrance, or the humming-bird the iridescence of its restless wings ! What a pity it would be if humanity could be at all mown down to a dead level like a lawn, and the heavens, in place of con- taining the greater and the lesser glories, were all lit up with myriads of farthing candles, all of equal dimness. The Londoner who has learned to enjoy his season properly, and to linger over its flavour, as a true scholar in wines would trifle with a beaded glass of amber Sauterne, and bless the Chateau-Yquem Avhere it was cradled into sweetness, knows well what pleasures can be extracted from the mere contemplation of those more heroic exemplars of humanity who glide about the town in such Elysian guise. Arch- bishop Whately and the economists are right : you must have duchesses, that it may be well with the beggars ; but for poor Dives, who I pro-


test to my thinking, was somewhat hardly used, there would have been no broken victuals, no savoury scraps for starving Lazarus. But these are knotty points ; — we had best fall back on the Loudon season.

1 lay no great stress on that false start before Easter. It is but a foretaste, or rather a whet before the banqxiet ; indeed it might more apth' be compared to the tuning-up of the fiddle before Signer Costa takes his seat, and with one wave of his magic wand opens the Palace of Music at a blow. If any one should be disposed to take a little turn to the French capital before the occur- rence of the Easter winter — of late years we have commonly had snow at that season — if there were not room for actual commendation, you woidd scarcely think him worthy of absolute blame. It is the time when second and third-rate singers establish their failures as facts on the operatic stage. It is the time when theatrical managers depend upon the fag-ends of worn-out themes, and try the patience of the public whilst they are burnishing up their tinsel and spangles for fresh and unwonted effects. It is a time when shabby-genteel people who but wish to spread a report aliout their vicinage that they have been up to London " for the season," spend a fortnight or three weeks in town, and return to their usiial and congenial hypocrisies, iinder the false impression that they are not found out. There is little good, and much bad about that false-birth, the London season before Easter. The real people will not keep o])en-houses for shadows. Those who constantly inhabit London, maintain the even tenor of their way, and will not suffer themselves to be drawn into demonstrations which can have no substantial results. The country pilgrims have not yet arrived. They wisely stop down in their own domains, and refuse to bear their part in an idle mockery. You may notice that this is the time chosen by the astuter shopkeepers for calling to their aid the skill of the house-painter and decorator. They have put their cleanings and burnishings off till the last moment, that they may show in full brilliancy when it is most need- ful to be brilliant. They know what can be accomplished in three weeks by a combination between inclement skies and London "blacks," and will not make their running till the critical moment. Their gains before Easter are nothing but tributes from country cousins, not worthy of serious account.

When the real season has set in, it seems as though all persons who can do anything better than their fellows, in any quai'ter of the globe, had descended like a swarm of locusts upon the town. The Monsieurs, and the Signori, and the Herrs, flock to our shores with the hope of levy- ing tribute from the Londoners in one form or another. One gentleman has a marvellous v.t de j)oitrine ; another produces musical sounds by merely thumping his chin ; a third can do more in the conjuring way than has ever been thought possible before ; a fourth relies for success ujion the intelligent action of a set of well trained poodles ; a fifth will cure all your ailments by throwing her- or him- self into a mesmeric con- dition, and prescribing a^^t remedies for your

Xover's Tesseract 4.1 sample

[edit]
Extended content
38 


ONCE A WEEK, 

{Jere 7, 1800, 


 


all that makes life delightful to the feelings and 
the senses, and now all that is quite, quite gone ! 
‘Were I to knock at the door now, and race up 
the stairs as of old, Betty would be overcome, and 
the excellent head of the family inside would give 
me in charge on the suspicion of having a design 
against the great-coate and umbrellas, No poetry 
in London! No poetry save a man is sitting and 
mueezing on a swab of wet mosé—a Highland 
piper being at hand with one of those horrid in- 
straments of torture applied to his hard, horny 
lips! Why, one could write a sonnet about South 
Audley Street. 


But if London at all times is better than any ! 

other place you could name, what is it not during 
the season, when every joy is at ita climax, and 
when all your friends and acquaintances from all 
parte of the country, and from all parte of the 
continent, and from all parts of the world, come 
dropping in thick as gnate used to be in summer 
evenings—when there were summer evenings, and 
there were gnats. I know that some uaneigh- 
bourly sort of people will have it that London is 
most delightful in September, when everybody is 
out of town, and the Hindu sweeper in Saint 
James's Square leaves off peddling with the unpro- 
fitable mud at his crossing, and, folding hia arms 
across his breast, meekly gives in to Budhism. 
Of course London is pleasant in September when 
the seat of empire is your own—but it is pleasant 
as sleep is after toil, or night after day. I like, 
as well as any man, to have the library in the 
club entirely to myself, and to moralise in the 
deserts of Old Bond Street, but human nature 
has also ita social and its gorgeous side. I 
have a rich vein of duchesses in my mind, 
which I can open up during the London aeason. 
If ever there was a loiterer by old bookshops, and a 
lover of old crinkum-crankume of every kind, I am 
that idle, uscless person : but of all the fair sights 
which the London streets can show, the fairest 
are those beautiful young maids and matron 
who, as the season grows fervont, are drawn about 
in their triumphal cara by horses auch as Greece 
never dreamed of, for all the testimony of her 
Elgin marbles. How all that human ingenuity 
could contrive, or human industry procure from 
all quarters of the globe, has been lavished on 
these Summer Queens; and how they take it as a 
matter of course, a8 the rose does its fragrance, 
or the humming-bird the fridescence of its 
restless wings! What o pity it would be if 
humanity could be at all mown down to a desd 
level like a lawn, and the heavens, in place of con- 
taining the greater and the lesser glories, were all 
lit up with myriads of farthing candles, all of 
equal dimness. The Londoner who has learned 
to enjoy his season properly, and to linger over 
ita favour, as a true scholar in wines would trifle 
with a beaded glass of amber Sauterne, and bleas 
the Chiteau-Yquem where it was cradled into 
sweetness, knows well what pleasures can be 
extracted from the mere contemplation of those 
more heroic exemplars of humanity who glide 
about the town in such Elysian guiso. Arch- 
bishop Whately and the economists are righ 
you must have duchessea, that it may be well 
‘with the beggars; but for poor Dives, who I pro- 


  


 


test to my thinking, was somewhat hardly used, 
there would have been no broken victuals, no 
savoury acraps for starving Lazarus. But these are 
knotty points ;—we had best fall back on tha 
London season. 

I lay no great stress on that false start before 
Easter. It in but a foretaste, or rather a whet 
before the banquet; indeed it might more aptly 
be compared to the tuning-up of the fiddle before 
Signor Costa takes hie seat, and with one wave of 
his magic wand opens the Palace of Music at a 
blow. If any one should be disposed to take a 
little turn to the French capital before the occur 
rence of the Easter winter—of late years we have 
commonly had suow at that season—if there were 
not room for actual commendation, you would 
scarcely think him worthy of absolute blame. It is 
the time when second and third-ratesingersestablish. 
their failnraa as facte on the operatic stage. Tt is 
the time when theatrical managers depend upon 
the fag-ends of worn-out themes, and try the 
patience of the public whilst they are burnishing 
up their tinsel and spangles for fresh and unwonted 
effects, It is a time when shabby-genteal people 
who but wish to spread a report about their 
vicinage that they have been up to London “ for 
the season,” spend a fortnight or three wecks in 
town, and return to their umal and congenial 
hypocrisies, under the false impression that they 
are not found out. There ia little good, and much 
bad shout that felse-birth, the London season 
before Easter. The real people will not keep 
open-houses for chadows. Those who constantly 
inhabit London, maintain the even tenor of their 
way, and will not suffor themselves to be drawn 
into demonstrations which can have no eubstantial 
results. The country pilgrims have not yet 
arrived. They wisely stop down in their own 
domains, and refuse to bear their part in an idle 
mockery. You may notice that this is the time 
choaen by the astuter shopkeepers for calling to 
their aid the skill of the honse-painter and 
deoorstor. They have put their cleanings and 
burnishings off till the last moment, that they 
may show in full brilliancy when it ia moat need- 
ful to be brilliant. They know what can be 
accomplished in three weeke by a combination 
between inclement skios and London “blacks,” 
and will not make their running till the critical 
moment. Their guins bofore Easter are nothing 
‘but tributes from country cousins, not worthy of 
serious account. 

‘When the real season has set in, it seems as 
though all persons who can do anything better 
than their fellows, in any quarter of the globe, 
had descended like a swarm of locusts upon the 
town. The Monsicurs, and the Signori, and the 
Herra, flock to our shores with the hope of levy- 
ing tribute from tho Londoner in one form or 
another, One gentleman has a marvellous ut de 
poitrine; auother produces musical sounds by 
merely thumping his chin; » third ean do more 
in the conjuring way than bas ever been thought 
possible before; a fourth relies for success upon 
the intelligent ‘action of a set of well trained 
poodles; a fitch will oure all your ailments by 
throwing her- or him. self into s mesmeric con- 
dition, and prescribing apt remedies for your