Bacon's Essays/Of Marriage and Single Life

by Francis Bacon

VI

OF MARRIAGE AND SINGLE LIFE

He that hath Wife and Children hath given Hostages to Fortune; For they are Impediments to great Enterprises, either of Vertue, or Mischiefe. Certainly, the best workes, and of greatest Merit for the Publike, have proceeded from the unmarried or Childlesse Men, which, both in Affection and Meanes, have married and endowed the Publike. Yet it were great Reason^[1] that those that have Children should have greatest care of future times, unto which, they know, they must transmit their dearest pledges. Some there are who, though they lead a Single Life, yet their Thoughts doe end with themselves, and account future Times Impertinences^[2]. Nay, there are some other that account Wife and Children but as Bills of charges^[3]. Nay more, there are some foolish rich covetous Men that take a pride in having no Children, because^[4] they may be thought so much the richer. For, perhaps, they have heard some talke, Such an one is a great rich Man; And another except^[5] to it, Yea, but he hath a great charge of Children; As if it were an Abatement to his Riches. But the most ordinary cause of a Single Life is Liberty; especially in certaine Selfepleasing and humorous^[6] Mindes, which are so sensible of every restraint as they will goe neare to thinke^[7] their Girdles and Garters to be Bonds and Shackles. Unmarried Men are best Friends, best Masters, best Servants, but not alwayes best Subiects; For they are light^[8]to runne away, And almost all Fugitives are of that Condition. A Single Life doth well with Church men^[9]; For Charity will hardly water the Ground, where it must first fill a Poole. It is indifferent^[10] for Iudges and Magistrates; For if they be facile^[11] and corrupt, you shall have a Servant five times worse than a Wife. For^[12] Souldiers, I finde the Generalls commonly, in their Hortatives^[13], put Men in minde of their Wives and Children: And I thinke the Despising of Marriage, amongst the Turkes, maketh the vulgar^[14] souldier more base. Certainly, Wife and Children are a kinde of Discipline of Humanity; And single Men, though they be many times more Charitable, because their Meanes are lesse exhaust^[15], yet, on the other side, they are more cruell and hard hearted, (good to make severe Inquisitors), because their Tendernesse is not so oft called upon. Grave Natures, led by Custome and therfore constant, are commonly loving Husbands; As was said of Ulysses, Vetulam suam prætulit Immortalitati^[16]. Chast Women are often Proud and froward^[17], as Presuming upon the Merit of their Chastity. It is one of the best Bonds, both of Chastity and Obedience, in the Wife, if She thinke her Husband Wise, which She will never doe, if She finde him Iealous. Wives are young Men's Mistresses, Companions for middle Age, and old Men's Nurses: So as^[18] a Man may have a Quarrell^[19] to marry, when he will. But yet, he was reputed one of the wise Men, that made Answer to the Question, When a Man should marry? A young Man not yet, an Elder Man not at all. It is often seene that bad Husbands have very good Wives; whether it be that it^[20] rayseth the Price of their Husbands Kindnesse, when it comes; Or that the Wives take a Pride in their Patience. But this^[21] never failes, if the bad Husbands were of their owne choosing, against their Friends consent; For then they will be sure to make good^[22] their owne Folly.

 

1. it would be reasonable to think
2. no concern of theirs
3. items of expense
4. in order that
5. take exception
6. eccentric
7. that they will almost think
8. ready and unencumbered
9. clergymen
10. a matter of no consequence either way
11. easily influenced
12. As for
13. exhortations
14. common
15. exhausted
16. He preferred his old wife to immortality.
17. perverse
18. so that
19. pretext
20. i.e. that this badness
21. viz. the pride of the wives in their patience
22. justify