Indira and Other Stories/Indira/Chapter 6
VI.
And then I banished care from my face. I knew already that it was my smiling glance that had attracted his roving fancy. I thought to myself that if the rhinoceros does not sin in using his mighty horn, if the elephant is permitted to use his tusks, if the tiger defends himself with his cruel claws, if the buffalo can gore his foe with his huge horns, surely a poor little woman may use the feeble weapons at her disposal. "My darling," I thought, "I will use the powers Providence has given me—for your happiness and mine." I left his side and sat down at a distance. I began to converse gaily. He approached me. "Go away," I said, "I see you have made a mistake. You have misunderstood me." I smiled as I spoke, and (I must tell the whole truth, if you are to understand my story) I managed to shake down the braids of my hair. As I talked to him, I occupied myself in binding the coils afresh.
"You have completely misunderstood me," I repeated. "I am no wanton. I merely came to you because I wanted to hear news of home. It is so long since I have met anyone from our country!"
I suppose he did not believe me. He had the audacity to come and sit by me. I only laughed and said, "As you won't obey orders, I must go away. I must say good-night."
So saying, I rose to my feet. Seeing that I was in earnest, the poor man was in despair. He seized my hand. I angrily tore it from his grasp. But still I smiled, I smiled.
And yet I cried, "You are a bad man! Do not touch me! Do you think I am a wanton woman?"
As I spoke, I walked resolutely towards the door. My husband—I am ashamed to use the word as I think of it—restrained me by force.
"Have pity on me," he cried, "have pity on me! Do not go away. I am maddened by the sight of your beauty. Never have I seen such charm, such loveliness!"
I turned back, but I refused to sit down again.
"Ah, Sir," I said, "you have me at a cruel disadvantage. I admit, yes, I admit I like you. Think what it costs me to say no to you! But what can I do? A woman's sole treasure is her virtue. Shall I buy one day's joy with life-long sorrow and shame? Let me go."
"Let me swear," he cried, "that you shall be my heart's mistress all my life long. Why talk of one day's pleasure?"
I laughed, and said I put no faith in such vows. I was going away again and had reached the door, when, no longer able to restrain himself, he fell at my feet and held me back.
I was filled with pain to see his evil plight. "Let us go to your lodgings," I said, tempting him. "If we stay here, you will go away presently and leave me."
Of course he was only too ready to consent. His lodging was hard by, in Simla, and we went thither, he and I together. When we got there, I noticed that there were two rooms. Into one of these I preceded him, slammed the door in his face, and drew the bolts! The poor man was left outside!
He made the most piteous entreaties to be admitted. I laughed and said, "I have now entered your service. But let me see if the flood of your passion will not have run dry by to-morrow morning. If I find that you are still as fond of me to-morrow, we will have some further talk. Now say good-night, and go away."
I utterly refused to open the door, and finally he went away elsewhere. I hope he slept! It was quite late in the morning when I opened the door. I found him humbly waiting my pleasure. I took his hand in mine.
"Lord and master," I said, "either send me back to Ramram Datta, or promise not to come near me for a whole week. Let that be a test of your patience and fortitude."
My husband agreed to undergo this heroic test.