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Lapsus Calami (Aug 1891)/To R. K.

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For other versions of this work, see To R. K..
A takeoff on Rudyard Kipling, referencing the popular works of H. Rider Haggard. First published in the Cambridge Review, 29 January 1891, and subsequently in all editions of Lapsus Calami.
The Browning quotation is from 'Waring'.
4667177Lapsus Calami — To R. K.James Kenneth Stephen

To R. K.

As long I dwell on some stupendousAnd tremendous (Heaven defend us!) Monstr'-inform'-ingens-horrendous Demoniaco-seraphic Penman's latest piece of graphic. Browning.
Will there never come a season Which shall rid us from the curse Of a prose which knows no reason And an unmelodious verse: When the world shall cease to wonder At the genius of an Ass, And a boy's eccentric blunder Shall not bring success to pass:
When mankind shall be delivered From the clash of magazines, And the inkstand shall be shivered Into countless smithereens: When there stands a muzzled stripling, Mute, beside a muzzled bore: When the Rudyards cease from kipling And the Haggards Ride no more.