5
KNOWLEDGE IS POWER.
While a worthy individual, of the march of intellect school, was 'laying down the law' the other day to a knot of acquaintances on one of the streets of Cupar, he caught the eye of a carter hard by, who had been vainly endeavouring to raise a sack of potatoes upon his cart, and who, on the instant, thus appealed to the man of knowledge-'Come awa', Mr.——; knowledge is power, ye ken—gie us a lift on wi' this poke o'taties!'
A HARD WORLD.
A man who came to market to dispose of his cattle, entered into conversation with another on the subject of hard times. 'Yes,' said the cattle dealer with an air of peevishness, 'times are hard, and this is a hard world —and, in my opinion, very few will get out of it alive.'
MAKING THE MOST OF IT.
Horne Tooke was the son of a poulterer, which he alluded to when called upon by the proud striplings of Eton to describe himself. 'I am,' said young Horne, 'the son of an eminent Turkey merchant.'
THE VALUE OF MARRIED MEN.
'A little more animation, my dear,' whispered Lady B——to the gentle Susan, who was walking languidly through a quadrille. 'Do leave me to manage my own business, mamma,' replied the provident nymph; 'I shall not dance my ringlets out of curl for a married man.' 'Of course not, my love; I was not aware who your partner was.'
QUITE GROUNDLESS.
'I am happy, Ned, to hear the report that you have succeeded to a large landed property.' 'And I am sorry, Tom, to tell you that it is groundless.'
A NOUN OF DIFFICULT DECLENSION.
It is a remarkable fact, that however well young ladies may be versed in grammar, very few of them are able to decline matrimony.
AN ACID DROP.
'I don't know where that boy got his bad temper— not from me, I'm sure.' 'No, my dear, for I don't perceive you have lost any.'
