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presence of a trusty friend, it was arranged that on the occasion of the next stolen interview they should endeavour to so disable the audacious fencer as to render his capture an easy conquest. T h e day and the hour came round, the two friends were to all appearance fully enjoying themselves, and whilst intently engaged over a rubber of whist, the lady contrived to noiselessly slip out and m a k e her way to the garden. Both m e n as quickly followed, and posted themselves at the end of a back verandah, from which any attempt to scale the garden wall could be observed. They were armed each with a rifle well primed with slugs, and the husband, with his at full cock, watched with a cool head and steady hand, expecting every m o m e n t to see some object mounting the barricade. A quarter of an hour had not elapsed when some moving form was observed to climb the enclosure—first the head, then the b o d y — a n d when it got astride, the report of a gunshot was heard, followed by an inward somersault by the intruder, and a howling and wailing from the garden, an emotional duet, unequalled for reality, by any operatic performance in Melbourne since. D o n n a Julia was certain that her Juan had been immolated, she heard the shot and the exclamations from under the garden fence—but instead of going into hysterics, she had the good sense to go in for a good cry, and as she left the garden, she was passed at its entrance by the watchers, eager to pounce upon and bag their game. Rushing towards the quarter from which the yelling still proceeded, and absolutely certain that the right m a n had c o m e to grief, their astonishment and disappointment m a y be imagined, when they found, not a wounded lion of a lawyer at bay, but a scurvy hound of a night-hawk, who had adventured on a raid of apple-stealing, and got paid-off in a manner he little expected. Fortunately, no vital part was injured, though a slug embedded in thefleshin the region of the extremities, caused the poor wretch to writhe and roar in such a fashion that it was difficult to know on the instant whether to give him over to the police or not, for as to a public hospital, there was none such in existence. A little reflection soon brought about a decided line of action. T h e affair had n o w assumed such a ludicrous aspect, the tragedy had dropped with such a screaming farce, and would be such a windfall as was never dreamed of for the newspapers and general scandal-mongers of Melbourne, that the desirability of keeping it from the public ear was so obvious, that steps were at once taken to do so. T h e services of a trusty servant were procured, and the wounded man, well gagged with a woollen comforter to keep his tongue in check, and wrapped up in a rug, was borne away by the three persons through a back gate, and taken to a boarding-house in the vicinity, where a liberal payment acted as a lock-jaw upon injudicious curiosity. Dr. O'Mullane, a leading physician of the time, was called in, and in the course of a few weeks, when the patient became thoroughly convalescent, a substantial douceur induced him to effect a clear out of Melbourne, and so, what at the commencement promised m u c h more than mere unpleasantness, ended m u c h better than could have been expected. T h e affair, of course, afterwards oozed out, but in too stale and desultory a manner to be available for the newspapers. Besides, it was a dangerous toy for journalists to play with, as it was only based on rumour, and the position and profession of the individuals mainly implicated, induced such a fear of a libel action as could not be lightly disregarded. I m a y say, as exaggerated and erroneous versions of this episode have been given to the public, that the one n o w printed, I had from the lips of the gentleman w h o acted as the husband's side m a n on the memorable night. H e also informed m e that if the apple-stealer had not opportunely appeared on the scene, the other would in all probability have been shot, for he arrived on the ground after the apple m a n had commenced the ascent, and was transfixed with rage and jealousy, naturally thinking there was " another Richmond in thefield,"but the report of the shot awoke him to a sense of his own perilous position, so he beat a hasty retreat, and like a wise man, kept his own counsel. Never did an unconscious scapegoat do more good, for if the real Simon Pure had been shot that night, whether killed or wounded, the matter could not possibly have been hushed up as it was, and a public exposure, and probably a public prosecution, would have produced consequences of a character the extent of which it would be difficult to estimate. T h e occurrence had the effect of a salutary warning to the two principal personages. Donna Julia was more strict in her allegiance to her husband, and D o n Juan thenceforth was a good boy. T h e D o n and the D o n n a are still in the land of the living, the gentleman so far reclaimed from his early Godless ways as to be n o w a solemn-faced, bard-featured, God-fearing veteran. H e may be even classified as being amongst the extreme unco guid, and so impressed in all he does with such an absorbing conscientiousness that he generally acts under the influence of a pocket Bible,