Page:Grimshaw, Bagshaw and Bradshaw.djvu/29

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GRIMSHAW, BAGSHAW, AND BRADSHAW.
25

but worse you can't—no, I mean—really, as I said before, what with Towzers, and Bradshaws, Bagshaws, and Grimshaws, and Fannys, and Emilys, I'm in such a state of confusion that——

Fan. That I'm afraid you will scarcely forgive me for being the cause of it. I can only plead, as my excuse, my anxiety to unite my dear Emily to the man of her heart.
Tow. But where is this man of her heart? Where is this Bradshaw?
Grim. You mean Bagshaw—no, Bagshaw—no—I shall never understand how matters exactly stand! No matter, there's one interesting fact clearly established, you consent to become Mrs. Grimshaw. I don't care what becomes of anybody else—much as I love them—I don't care one straw what becomes of them! But, as you say, where is this Bradshaw?
Brad. (who has entered during his speech, being beckoned on by Bagshawand touching Grimshaw's shoulder) I'm Bradshaw!
Grim. Oh, here you are! (embracing him) and how are you, Bradshaw? I mean Bagshaw—no! it's no use; I never shall be able to understand!
Bag. My dear Sir, I give you joy! (to Grimshaw.)
Grim. Do you? then perhaps you'll give me my hat, (crosses to Bagshaw) and take your own. (exchanges them—slaps bad hat on Bagshaw's head) Come, it's quite early yet, so suppose we make a night of it—what d'ye say to a supper? I propose that Towzer finds the supper, (crosses to c.)
Omnes. Agreed, agreed!
Grim. Carried unanimously! Don't go and throw away a lot of money, Towzer; do the thing well, but not extravagantly; and all I can say is, that if you'll send in the cold fowls and the lobsters, I'll stand the pickles—that's what I call doing the thing liberally—and (to audience) if you will only provide a liberal supply of approbation, there won't be a happier party sit down to supper in the Haymarket, than Grimshaw, Bagshaw, and Bradshaw!