in a huff, and told her she should see she was not her mother, for that she could leave her just where she found her; and, seeing she could not be content to be served by the kindness of a friend, but that she would needs make a mother of her, she would, for the future, be neither mother or friend, and so bid her go to service again, and be a drudge as she was before.
The poor girl cried most lamentably, but would not be beaten out of it still; but that which dumbfoundered Amy more than all the rest was that when she had rated the poor girl a long time, and could not beat her out of it, and had, as I have observed, threatened to leave her, the girl kept to what she said before, and put this turn to it again, that she was sure, if Amy wa'n't, my Lady Roxana was her mother, and that she would go find her out; adding, that she made no doubt but she could do it, for she knew where to inquire the name of her new husband.
Amy came home with this piece of news in her mouth to me. I could easily perceive when she came in, that she was mad in her mind, and in a rage at something or other, and was in great pain to get it out; for when she came first in, my husband was in the room. However, Amy going up to undress her, I soon made an excuse to follow her, and coming into the room, 'What the d—l is the matter, Amy?' says I; 'I am sure you have some bad news.' 'News', says Amy aloud; 'ay, so I have; I think the d—l is in that young wench. She'll ruin us all and herself too; there's no quieting her.' So she went on and told me all the particulars; but sure nothing was so astonished as I was, when she told me that the girl knew I was married, that she knew my husband's name, and would endeavour to find me out. I thought I should have sunk down at the very words. In the middle of all my amazement, Amy starts up and runs about the room like a distracted body. 'I'll put an end to it, that I will; I can't bear it I must murder her, I'll kill the b'; and swears by her Maker, in the most serious tone in the world, and then repeated it over three or four times, walking to and again in the room. 'I will, in short, I will kill her, if there was not another wench in the world,'
'Prithee hold thy tongue, Amy' says I; 'why, thou art mad.' 'Ay, so I am', says she, 'stark mad; but I'll be the death of her for all that, and then I shall be sober again.' 'But you sha'n't' says I; 'you sha'n't hurt a hair of her head; why, you ought to be hanged for what you have done already, for having resolved on it is doing it; as to the guilt of the fact, you are a murderer already, as much as if you had done it already.'
'I know that', says Amy, 'and it can be no worse; I'll put you out of your pain, and her too? she shall never challenge you for her mother in this world, whatever she may in the next.' 'Well, well', says I, 'be quiet, and do not talk thus, I can't bear it.' So she grew a little soberer after a while.
I must acknowledge, the notion of being discovered carried with it so many frightful ideas, and hurried my thoughts so much, that I was scarce myself any more than Amy, so dreadful a thing is a load of guilt upon the mind.
And yet, when Amy began the second time to talk thus abominably of killing the poor child, of murdering her, and swore by her Maker that she would, so that I began to see that she was in earnest, I was farther terrified a great deal, and it helped to bring me to myself again in other cases.
